Vidhaan

It feels like time has stopped. I have a few goals. I didn't want to write except for fiction, but something is amiss from the normal discourse. Something that wasn't fifteen years back. I remember just a decade ago, watching science fiction short films on the channel Dust on YouTube. It's a great channel for speculative and science fiction short films. It was a time when I didn't know the fact that humanity is a slave, and that even if we go to Mars as a species, we would remain a slave. In the late 2010s I realised that wherever I go in the country, and the world my backward third world town that now takes pride in eating pizzas travels with me. This town, was not so backward just twenty years ago, and I was there to see it. Yes, exploitation and murders were there but you could be safe if you weren't extremely unprivileged and minded your own business. The community was strong, and it was, in my case either relationship based or intellect based. Rapes as I grew up to realise are not reported in Purvanchal because the victims are silenced through blackmail and intimidation and as more beans spilled I found out that it is in fact centralised and is perpetuated by the deepest structure which is ironically the keeper of morality too. The best part is that rape is not used to discipline women, which is any way demonic, it is whimsical and the reason is assigned later. I was too busy chasing my goals that I failed to realise that I was having structural disadvantage, in my case it was just individualised whimsical hatred but it let me know how people might be structurally deprived of basics in the name of caste any other traits. And when I say basics I mean very basics, like food and medicine and inflow of finances in a family. It led me to realised that in Purvanchal's case absolute micromanagerial totalitarianism is going on with individualised exploitation and whimsical torture of people with no basis. It didn't really affect because I was fine, if not good, at what I did but the fact is that I was prevented from experiencing my own life which I anyway did. This is how people get into spirals of sex and drugs. It made me realise that the setup here, the region which has Kashi, is employment of lower class rapists who have existential jealousy on people above than them and granting full autonomy over their lives. It is, in short, weaponisation of lower classes against the middle classes by the so-called upper classes. It's a slavery situation and kind of cyberpunk setup which is kind of hilarious in a third-world backward area. The majority of lower classes except the criminals who are employed suffer terribly and perish and now since a decade the same is applicable to the middle classes as the intellectual community eroded and caste based alliances form. Here is the fun part, I just wanted to see my patients and write my stories and there was nothing else. The real culture by now is totally eroded and a mongrel cultures is being promoted by totally inept rapists with elements of religious dogma. It is kind of hilarious that these motherfuckers are applying divide and rule and disarming people of any sort of potential empowerment like education and knowledge but then what can be said, time is cyclical. I am just having fun and I just read science for leisure now as I realised that colonization of Mars now means sending slave labourers from Bihar to die their first minus the culture that the "girmitiyas" sent to West Indian sugar cane fields had. It is feudalism 101 with corporate greed and all of these motherfuckers are rapists behind the veneer of civility. God simply doesn't exist but He/She empowers passively and it's best to worship one's gods than be forced to worship others which might happen in changing political scenario and because time is cyclical. 

Vishwaguru

As far as Purvanchal goes, the goal is to cause maximum discomfort and irritation caused by the misalignment of soul and existence, and it seems that it is the pattern of greater nation too. It is why kids leave their corporate careers to try their hands at standup comedy and fail to find satisfaction there too. And anyway this country has become about totally about words and not intent so comedy is anyway out of question except the industry plants. You say something and then you spend your time proving that you didn't mean in the way it was understood. Being in Purvanchal I have understood that it too is a method of exploitation, individuals with edge in power dynamic feign to misunderstand what you have said intentionally so that you spend your time proving that it was not said in the manner it was understood and then they exploit you for what you said. Exploitation is absolutely intimate in Purvanchal and it is existential and unfortunate part is absolute lower class gutter scum have access to intimate details of people way better than them, of course for blackmail. If you want to see the the magic of intent watch David Dhawan movies, they have class related humour but since the intent is good they are not offensive, in fact hilarious, like the character of a spoilt rich kid in the movie Raja Babu. At present what is happening in this country is permanent consolidation of power with hyperreality constructed solely of mostly untalented industry plants and erosion of indigenous myth-making. The goal is trapping people in islands of their individualised suffering and this individualisation becomes more and more mindless and careless as the social class of a person decreases, and hence you find the poor people with their souls totally misaligned with their existence drinking country liquor in a country where drinking alcohol is a social taboo. You see the totalitarianism now, don't you? The ultimate goal as I realised is hoarding culture and aesthetics and depriving the lower classes of the same with making the lower classes bear the burden of a mongrel dogmatic culture, a thing which wasn't there twenty years ago. 

Doomsday Prepper

It seems like suffering is not enough for being a writer you have to pimp yourself too. Thankfully with the internet becoming mainstream, writing has become redundant and now no one has interest in reading a book like Twilight or Harry Potter until and unless they are bookworms or are conditioning their kids to develop reading habits. Published writers in the West go to conferences and bookstores to pimp themselves, and it would be a shame if these writers know that writing, at the deepest level, is redundant. This doesn’t happen in India because even though it loves copying the West and would have loved its capitalist model for the writers, in the past decade the act of reading itself has become redundant. When the pass time of a country is playing crab in the bucket games for everything including railway ticketing and rations who has the time for reading. I still write because a lot of people aren’t really clear about the basics of this nation and for them I have to keep writing as long as I can detailing the shitshow that is being run in the name of democracy and ancient civilization. I have seen the truth and it’s so cheap that upon knowing it, anyone who doesn’t love his family enough would kill themselves. I started observing when the hyperreality of this nation started collapsing, and I remember the date, ie. 2013 and I am still seeing it collapse in real-time. It’s not a doomsday scenario because doom is permanent for whom it is. It’s kind of funny that people in America make for themselves bunkers called doomsday preppers. The doom isn’t real, I mean it is real but it would first be psychological and then it would manifest in the worldly life, Rhonda Byrne isn’t total hogwash. When my doom introduced me to it, the first thing I did was make a bunker in my head and it was later when I realised that frugality and simplicity too was a hogwash I despite being a very minimalistic person added the element of a hammock and a pina colada. Sounds funny? It’s kind of tough having an element of a hammock and pina colada in a doomsday shelter. As far as personal learning curve goes, by 2021 I had realised that writing is redundant both as a calling and a profession unless you are in the job of healing, like I am, or you are a propagandist. It was funny to ultimately realise that the blackmail is existential and so is the intimidation and coercion. When such is the case philosophy of existentialism doesn't matter and the only thing that keeps one existential and stops one from becoming a full blown nihilist is love. The bottom line is that one has to create their doomsday shelter and should do their doomsday prepping and while they are at it they should also build their cozy place inside the bunker, whether it be a hammock or pina colada or a fireplace and coffee. Writing is redundant for me, and I don't write for myself. The only two reasons I write is, one, so that I can pull innocents out of hells created for them and two, and it might sound paranoid, to prevent myself from getting entrapped or framed. What I really want to write for myself is fiction. We are watching the collapse of a civilizational in real-time but as I have seen it, the collapse happened a long time ago, it's just the outer walls that are collapsing now.

Contrast

When one is growing up they have a belief about the world and then the world, or the country, turns out to be totally different from what they thought. For those who write, a lot of writing comes from the conflict between these two worlds, the world they thought it was and the world it actually turned out to be. Of course things are not black and white but the arrangement is such that they can be. The state of people is like an animal with an ever streching leash in its neck, yes they can go as far as possible but the leash can be tightened any second and their freedom can end with it, which is very different from being unleashed which the illusion promises. A lot of my writing too comes from the conflict of the world I thought it to be and the world it turned out to be. I realised that at the deepest level, well deepest for most people, this country functions on sadistic delight in suffering of innocents. At the deepest level, as I have seen it, the executive apparatus, which is unfortunately composed of genocidal rapists, sees everyone as corruptible and hence punishable before they have even committed any wrong, and it's not even about punishment, they are eager to torture people and eager to find reasons to torture people and derive, as I said, sadistic delight from it. One of my goal in writing is to contrast the world I used to think it to be and the world it really is, though at present I lack the cognitive ability to do it but I'll try to do it. As I said people are actually leashed animals and my leash has been tight since always. I have not known how it actually is to be unleashed and so I had to find a way to be unleashed while being leashed. I was able to see the seam of the simulation which many do not see and I was not interested in it actually, what I was actually interested in were nature and universe and I ultimately realised that the path to nature and universe goes through the road of politics. It's as simple as animals for slaughter not requiring to know what is beyond the fence of the animal farm, as their job is to fatten up and then get slaughtered, just as the job of a beast of burden is to carry the burden. If one's life is terrible, thinking that it would become better is like a bullock at an oil mill thinking his life would get better, or a horse pulling a tonga thinking life would get better. There are no achche din, only achche din is now.

Fire in The Hole

I have, in the past decade, have had the complete bird eye view of lower 2/3rds of the iceberg this nation is. It has been thoroughly disappointing but the good news is that it cannot really get any worse than what it already is. As it seems, collapse of this nation is imminent and I have seen that internally it has already collapsed. What remains is an empty shell where people are mindlessly chasing their dreams and no one is content with their lives. People are making "slow living" reels in this country not because life is fast, but because they are discontent with how time is passing. It is in 2013 I realised that the rich of this country are soul sucking parasites who employ lower class soul sucking parasites. I had that Kafka vibe and with time I realised why it was so. The first thing that was done in 2013-14 was blaming me to be a communist, though in the words of Norman Osborne I would say that "I'm some what of a capitalist myself", though I'm an ethical capitalist which these motherfuckers practicing extractive feudal capitalism would never understand. In the years following 2013, I realised that institutions in this country are hollow. By 2016 the enlightenment arrived that for the deepest structure in this nation, only two things matter, sex and money. I might have thought that I got into the soup in 2013 but I was already in the soup since the start. While I realised there is no free will for the unaware in this nation I salvaged my free will to be able to make sense of the things that were happening to me. It was absolutely disappointing to realise that the fate of people in this land is in the hands of criminally insane rapists employed by the rich. It was a baffling realisation and I realise that what I write might sound trauma informed but I didn't really have any trauma, if anything I had fun seeing the shit show of absolute entitled incompetence. The best part in all of it was that I had no business in it, I just wanted to work in fields of psychiatry and physiology. The real engine of this nation which is occulted from the common view is hatred and while the drama of benevolence of politicians and industrialists goes on these motherfuckers keep functioning on whimsical hatred. When you can't write a normal adventure fantasy in a country,.which I wanted to, you realise that.media in this country is tightly controlled. The thing to know is while this shit might seem that it is BJP as the feeling of totalitarianism and "something is very wrong" started in around 2014, I know for a fact because I was an eye witness that it started in 2013, a year before BJP came to power. The institution and feudal apparatuses were built in by Congress and one can only say that BJP is "also" in it not that it's only BJP. I know for a fact that these motherfuckers have sold the nation and randomly preying on souls of innocents and destroying legacies of families. So all that remains now is to try to earn money and having fun because those who talk about God are just mouthpieces of these soul sucking parasites. Thanks to Ambani's cheap internet the real shit show this nation is, is for all to see except those who have curated their algorithms for "slow living" and "aesthetics".

On Carrying On

I thought I would handle a morbid topic like death today, specifically suicide. I don't judge people who kill themselves, life is tough for a lot of people. The pain and torture that human souls go through can't really be described in words and so should they choose to off themselves, people shouldnt be quick to judge them as they generally do. What I learnt about India, as a country, is that torture of souls of people even if it is infinite in nature is still made to be cheap. What rules this nation would inflict infinite torture on a person's soul while at the same time depriving them of basic dignity. The lore is later created by people and not the entity that inflicts torture on people. People off themselves mostly when they believe that there is no way out of the misery or, if others are involved, if they are cornered. There are other reasons too, the chief among them being shame and humiliation or disappointment with self. The deal with this nation is that those who suffer keep suffering and those who don't, don't at all. And so there is a vast gap in understanding of life between these two breeds of people. It is to be known that those who decide suffering for people in this country do not in the very least have the idea of what suffering is. At the maximum they just know how much a person will suffer when he or she is toetured an amount. They don't have first hand idea of suffering and hence no empathy. I got to experience the deep state of Purvanchal and so I could gauge the setup and anatomy of suffering in my region. It is here I came to know that individuals who have no empathy towards people because they themselves have never experienced suffering and can send people for eternity in hell just for a little cash, do feel empathy for each other. Like a rapist would feel empathy for a rapist, or a pedophile would feel empathy for a pedophile. How can such people feel empathy for each other when they haven't seen suffering at all, the answer is the fear of consequences if and when they are caught and that's why you see criminals banding up or ganging up together. As far as suffering goes, the sociopolitocoecomic pyramid is inverted up till upper middle class and imagine a man who is not even fit for cleaning a latrine toeturing and deciding the life of a professor. Sounds outrageous? That's the beauty of India, those who inflict suffering on people here do not even understand it's true meaning other than as concepts and they are employed by those who have had never had suffering in their lives at all. And so suffering and suicides lose their total dignity in this land. The only thing to know is that happiness is the most natural state of being and depression is a sociopolitical entity. Yes, it is real but it is a sociopolitical entity. Death is never the answer, but some times life loses meaning and leaves no options. The thing to know here is that even if you are a basket case one's very soul is a big motivator for the family, they may even think that one is a burden but the real loss is only felt when one is gone. Family is the biggest reason to keep kicking even when one is down and it helps knowing that absolute scum of the earth do not have any desire at all to die. 

Measuring Tape

I enjoyed the world building of Virgin Comics' The Sadhu and Devi. In late 2000s and early 2010s there were many comic books who have built great worlds. There were comic book magazines like Comic Jump that had stories with depth. I tried Indusverse comics too but they lack depth as shown in The Sadhu, Devi and Odayan by Level 10 Comics. Deep worlds are important, Western comics always have deep worlds, currently not with the mythic flavour I like but deep indeed. Comics of Alan Moore do have mythic depth within them. 90s comics has depth in them without fail and it makes me realise that depth comes from emotions and imagination. Even common comics had vast worlds capable of transferring you to a different world altogether. Comic Jump had strips like Shauya, Northern Song, The Rabhas Incident etcetera and Northern Song especially impressed me with its ancient kingdom and demon lore. What is not to like about a warrior trying to save a little girl from demon. There was a time when people could fantasize about saving little kids from demons and good and evil archetypes still existed. I kind of misplaced my belief when the shade of grey became prominent in my life and I started to believe that grey does exist, that good people turn bad due to their experiences but then I had my experiences and realised that while antiheros with shades of grey might exist they are basically good men with tortured souls, what I realised with time is that absolute demonic evil with no redeeming qualities at all, absolutely exists and unfortunately it runs the world. I like to build worlds with depth when I find time and feel easy with my writing block. Depth is necessarily, because the world is getting way to superficial and deep stories help people with seeing what is going on in the depths of society. Nietzsche was wrong, abyss doesn't look "back" at you, it is always looking at you.

Appendix

While I find all philosophy useless in the current economy, it doesn't actually make philosophy useless as I have been able to see the deep structures because I acquainted myself with it. Goal of philosophy is to make itself redundant. Like all psychiatry ends on two things, money and love of family. Goal of philosophy in the present world is making you see that it's all about power and ultimately sex and money. Love exists but it is for the lesser mortals like me and I love giving and receiving love. Love is painful but I would say it is worth the pain given you love the right person. That heaven and hell actually exist can never be known but they do exist on earth and hell is, in places like from where I belong, is specifically reserved for good people with demons employed to torture their soul and conscience though one must have a soul and conscience to get tortured. And while conscience gets one tortured it is undeniable proof that man or woman is good though the bad news is that the world is actually ruled by evil and we can only try to have bubbles of peace while hell unfolds around us. There is not much that can be done here, it's a play of greed, lust and gluttony and one has to see it around him while keeping himself together. I prefer competence over entitlement and I prefer justice over hypocrisy and I realise that there are millions of good people in the world world with misplaced priorities. The priority should always be earning money, loving your loved ones and family and minding your own business, everything else is taken care of by monkeys. I was little and I head read in Panchatantra a story about how during a rain a monkey destroyed the nest of a bird who had worked hard all year because the monkey himself did not have a place to stay, this is the actual state of this country, monkeys who have no place to stay destroying nests of birds, and these monkeys are employed by monkeys who actually have places to stay during rain. It's a save your own ass scenario with privileged circlejerks and cliques, islands of privilege, where the birds can save each other's ass, but what I talk about is bottom line because for me bottom lines matter. I realised sentimentality is useless in the current economy and I fear that due to consistent shaming it would go extinct, just like appendix, sentimentality is what powers all art and romance and it is unfortunate that assholes who think themselves as clever and who aren't more clever monkeys have destroyed it. I write to give people devices and tools to diagnose the root cause of their suffering and it is not more complex than a bunch of monkeys destroying their nests. 

Mother Sellers

One has to have his priorities straight. I have had tremendous experience with life in past decade and someone who writes I can't complain as it gives me things to write. Since 2016 I have seen Purvanchali sabotage and exploitation attempts and I kind of find it funny as I haven't lived in the region whole of my life. I know of Purvanchal as my villages and community but it was in 2016 that I got acquainted to the greater region. I have never considered my region to be inferior but it is post 2016 that I realised that it is in fact inferior and just a bit above Bihar because of superficial aesthetic belonging to the government of Uttar Pradesh. What a region is, is a direct reflection of those who rule it, common people are still good but given the condition of the situation at present I have no idea how long they would be so. The situation is of absolute totalitarianism, social engineering and eugenic approaches with rampant casteism and hate based exploitation and torture but unfortunately these motherfuckers aren't even brave enough to do it openly, they do it at the level way deeper and it is how I realised psychiatry as a subject is useless. The basis of exploitation of Purvanchal deep state, which is composed solely of rapists and criminals who have access to minds and bodies of people including women and children is favour and revenge. They will forcefully do a favor to you and then exploit it infinitely and make you do things that can justify taking revenge and so you can't say anything because the so-called revenge is "justified". It is like and infinite exploitation hack and of course target of it are good people. Of course these techniques are feudal and seem tribal, like the technique of coercing you to do something and raping your mother, sister and wife in front of you and it happens because the power dynamic is absolute. Needless to say that these motherfuckers are subhuman and also pimps and cucks because the self-hatred is so intense that they make people from their own culture and region exploited, humiliated and raped by individuals from outside. I kind of find this shit hilarious and it is ultimately tied to religion and God which makes it even more hysterical. Next time you come to Varanasi and you feel the "divine" and "spiritual" vibe, know that it is this what is happening in the lower two-thirds of region that Purvanchal is. Of course common people are not to be blamed and they are suffering but then people adapt to exploitation and not everyone is able to adapt in a good way. Purvanchal is an absolute gutter with needles philosophising and with a criminal core ruled by inferior scum. The deep structures employs predators who are, for the lack of a better word, "trained" to exploit any weakness, be it handicaps, sickness, guilt, inferiority complex, lack of self-esteem or self-confidence, shame and secrets while they actively create these things in the lives of people to keep them exploitable with blackmail and intimidation. This shit and how pathetic these motherfuckers are is hilarious and I just had a gala time witness these pathetic criminal scum doing this shit. What truly baffled my mind is that these motherfuckers make people commit incest and then blackmail people for them while keeping the pressure of repression on. I mean I had no business in this but someone has to do the job of airing the dirty laundry. And mind you, spiritual capital of India, the famed Kashi, is in this region. 

School Chale Hum

My ultimate goal as far as non-fiction is concerned to write a manifesto on how to survive this nation, though any manifesto will provide only twenty percent help rest one has to figure out on his own. The main focus while living in this country should be safety and efficiency because it is what is most required in this nation ultimately. The approach of Purvanchal towards me has been preventing me from making more relationships and preventing me from gaining skills but it didn't really work, I realise that it is the same for the greater nation as well. It is because an unskilled person is more exploitable because he is insecure about his abilities. It took me a while to realise that God is a criminal exploiter in this country. While that would be okay if we are really pushing it, the most unfortunate thing is God in this country is a predator too and it is centralised and this is why safety is important but that doesn't mean it is going to save you from targeted harassment, it is mms scandals of young girls release, because this shit is centralised, yes things are this simple in this country. Lack of education, with access to absolute truth, information and control and pychopathy is one hell of a drug and so is absolute power over people. Needless to say we have to save our own asses, and since the past decade helping others too comes with consequences. I think if I'm not dead I would get around to writing the manifesto but one has to realise that that it is not a BJP vs Congress issue, if anything the all baked in deep structures belong to Congress as it ruled for more than half a century, BJP is just filling its coffers while it can. I see people like William Dalrymple and Audrey Truscke and while Dalrymple poses as an indophile and is passable even if no one in this country needs to be told their history by a British guy, it's a "free" country and people can do whatever they want, Truschke is a straight up propagandist who is distorting India's history. And anyway there is no history accept the culture and traditions which these greedy rapists have destroyed by now. All that remains is to save your ass, while the system rapes you, and hope in just like the great Deepak Kalaal says, "system phaad denge". 

Caught in Providence

When I was in college I wanted to be a physician-writer, I had a concept of a novel in my head and I wanted to write comic books along with my practice. Comic book industry of this country collapsed by the mid 2013s and so I focused on my fiction and my novels which given the reality of this nation is thoroughly redundant. I have always liked Vice style journalism, and the reality of this nation I have seen in the past decade made me record what I saw. Recording reality of this nation is the job of journalists, but I have had personal experiences with journalists and I realise that there are only two kind of journalists a good ones and dead ones, there is a third kind of journalist in this country too, criminal ones a category in which a lot of journalists of today will fall. Journalism in this country is now sustained by voyeurism, schadenfreude and entitlement to voyeurism. In my personal opinion, journalism, in this country is top most scummy job, the next second is lawyers but there is still a lot of redeeming qualities about lawyers, especially in India. I had my introduction to deep state of India in 2013, just because of my writing and I was, thankfully due to my background in psychiatry, was able to make out that is in fact the rotten soul of this nation, not the one we see on Doordarshan or Incredible India! ads but the actual soul. I realised that it is essentially a criminal syndicate, and it is not God but criminals deciding the fates of people in this country, real actual criminals. Like I have said earlier a feudal-corporate nexus with the government, religion and mafia and media as its arms. I had never imagined that the media of this country would be outright criminal but unfortunately it turned out to be the truth, with "trusted" media outlets pumping propaganda that has no basis in the lived reality of today. When you have to struggle to write a book in a country you must realise that all media is in fact tightly controlled and anyway the the main source of recreation of the lower class and the upper class in this nation is sex, it's only the middle class that read books which again has decreased to a level at which it could be called negligible. Only free people in this country are the rich, while middle class for the most part live in totalitarianism perpetuated by lower class criminal scum employed by the rich. Yes, it is the weaponisation of lower class criminals against the middle class. A very Arthashastra style design but not as mythic and very cheap and while families are conspired against, the rich gatekeep rock music from people who really like it, a very street level music in the West but an "elite" thing here. The gatekeeping is simple, from books, movies, pizzas, and above all English while literary Hindi is fucked beyond repair. It was especially baffling to realise that every ugliness you see in this country is either actively propagated or is a result of intentional neglect, just at a level deeper than we think. And while I sometimes do this kind of gonzo journalism, I find it funny that while people think god is writing their fate, it's actually lower class criminals employed by the rich. Unfortunately there is no actual intelligence establishment in this country except this criminal syndicate moonlighting as Providence. 

Meethi Batein Bol Kar

Writing fiction is hard in this economy so I write non-fiction. The myth-making in this country has collapsed and while I would have loved superhero movies and mythofantasy in this counry's media, the reality of this nation which was able to observe in the past decade makes it redundant. I have been lucky enough to grow up reading works for children by great people like Anant Kushwaha and magazines like Chandamama and while I see the reality of this nation collapsing due to rampant exploitation which is visible through the internet which, again, has evolved into another tool for exploitation than what it was when I was younger during the Yahoo Messenger days when I used to roleplay Harry Potter characters in Harry Potter chatrooms. They have since 2013 tried to construct a Bigg Boss style hyperreality but failed because they are one, they are incompetent and two, they don't give a fuck about people or art. What you have now is localised mafia dramas, police procedurals, crime documentaries like Burari murders and historical-religious propaganda, which mind you, which mind you happened earlier too just in the favour of Muslims. The issue is, people's realities are individualised and constructed and totalitarianism is sporadic and packaged as fate and karma so that people don't come to know that it is in fact political. Mafia dramas and police procedurals are fine given they are done with intent, and people have options of warmth. The "warm" options that people now have are outright delusional that don't match the lived reality of the majority. I was in favour of TVF shows but as the reality of this nation collapses at the rate it is doing right now, they will become redundant. I like Anurag Kashyap movies but he has a knack of showing reality as it is, not to delude you but to make you confront it,.and he has intent, which these selected voyeurs who make propaganda lack. I don't really care about Indian media and news media as I don't have any interest in knowing if aliens drink cow milk, and watch either ill-intentioned criminal voyeurism or sentimental slop. I only watch superhero movies by Marvel and DC as they instill hope about the world even if there isn't any. As far as Purvanchal goes the meghdol I have experienced in since 2016, is false accusations, blame shifting and victim blaming and these motherfuckers specialise in taking credit for other people's work while shifting their blame on others. Purvanchal deep state philosophy is simple, as stated in the movie Soldier, "kaam khatam, aadmi khatam."

Karrant Maare Goriya

I wanted to work in the field of psychosomatology after studying physiology and psychiatry. Turns out healthcare is a scam and just something that you should be capable to afford and I'm not talking about 1 rupee prescriptions of paracetamol at primary health centres. I waited for long for silver lining, my authentic research has been stolen and so I would rather make metaphysical designs to counter deep exploitation. Once one realises that all of their woes are political in origin, suffering unless it's physical or emotional pain, subsides. And this realisation, this diagnosis and to give it to people is what I write my non-fiction for. The past decade has made me realise that this country is ruled by thoroughly incompetent and rapey assholes who have no idea what they are doing to people and they are doing it nonetheless. I am not the kind of a guy who enjoys spotlight, and I believe in doing my work quietly and it is for this reason I resorted to study Medical Physiology in 2015 so that I could do my work quietly in a corner of my lab. The way things are going, it seems that science as a method is going to be inaccessible to the common people and they will only see them as pseudoscientific nutrition and health reels on Instagram. Science is important and especially as scientific method though it might be possible that in some years textbooks might have the universe coming out of God's asshole. My belief is simple, if God is actually what he is, he doesn't give a fuck till we keep doing our work diligently and be kind to people around us. The rest is politics masquerading as God. Indian deep politics is lot about false accusations, blame shifting and victim blaming and as far as Purvanchal goes, power here is solely about retaining the right to rape, religion is just a hyperreality. People should learn about scientific method and if not standard research methodology then at least empirical research. My culture is destroyed and while people might see the hyperreality without substance and say it's not the case, I know the truth and so only thing that remains for me to have a bit of fun is science. There is no escape from this prison and one might even ignore the eugenic practices going on deep down but that becomes harder to ignore when one realises the absolute incompetence of these motherfuckers.

Horha

The deeper game is always identity and ego. I had an identity crisis and that identity crisis made sure that I don’t suffer with midlife crisis later. I sorted it once and for all. I’m a native of my hometown, and my region and yet the hometown as well as the region betrayed me and I realised that its not a one time case, people are being betrayed by their so-called hometowns and regions and the ultimate realisation is that there is no home in the world except family. Once I realised this bottom line life became incredibly easy. As far as Purvanchal goes, it’s a slavery situation perpetuated by habitual rapists, and unfortunately my beautiful culture only exists now as a hyperreality, a simulation while the real substance has eroded due to mindless exploitation. It took me a while to finally accept that it is in fact about sex and money in form of rape and exploitation at the deepest level, but for common people like me it is about love. I would rather take the pain love brings with it than give in to corruption. Knowing the greater truth has freed me. I’m not going to have a psychological crisis ever again. Financial yes, psychological no. This country is unfathomably ugly and I have been lucky enough to take a full tour of it. Once you see the ugliness of this country, all its beauty becomes redundant. What remains is nature, the universe and the most important of them all, family. This is the bottom line. You can keep you material desires, but the ultimate bottom line when the veil lifts are the things that provide free lunches, nature and family. I studied medicine and I was idealistic, I really wanted to heal people and with time I realised that healing people is not possible because those who control the society of this nation are profoundly sick and it is their disease that is reflecting in the health of people. As a doctor all one can do is “provide services” and take money. True healing is out of the question in this scenario. Politics thrives on spreading confusion about identity, about everything. When one realises that there are people in this country who are being systematically prevented from eating western food items and from watching western media and reading western literature, things kind of simplify. These things kind of lose meaning. And coming from a family that provided for the whole village, I kind of find it funny that assholes who rule the hearts and minds of people in this country are so cheap and petty. There are no legacies anymore because rapists will never be able to understand the concept of legacies. What remains is false pride and ego games and sooner one divorces himself from them the better. 

Comic Book Movies Talk

Comic book movies are one of the few interests I have left. I actively keep myself updated and follow what's going on in MCU and DCU. I recently watched Wonder Man and while a person liking drama would like it, I did not like it that much. I skipped some Marvel shows too, like Agatha All Along, and after a few episode Moon Knight, the casting of Oscar Isaac as Moon Knight, even though he is a great actor, did not really click with me, I would have preferred someone like Jake Gyllenhaal who could portray both emotional vulnerability and military training, not that Oscar Isaac did bad, he just didn't click with me as the character of Moon Knight and anyway Jake Gyllenhaal has already done the role of Mysterio in the MCU. X-men are coming to MCU and I'm curious who would they cast as Wolverine, I would have preferred Daniel Radcliffe but that's a far cry, though I think they should at least get Radcliffe a cameo just how Henry Cavill got a cameo as Wolverine in Deadpool and Wolverine. There are some MCU projects that I'm looking forward to Midnight Sons and hopefully they deliver. As far as DCU goes I didn't like Peacemaker Season 2 much and Superman too was okay but I'm hoping the other projects like Lanterns, Supergirl, Clayface and Man of Tomorrow deliver. I'm really interested in knowing who they would cast as DCU Batman. As far as Matter Reeves Batman is considered I am hoping he does better than the last time. And I also hope that whoever acquires WB and DC retains Snyderverse as Elseworlds. The current focus is on Daredevil Season 2, I'm looking forward to it, Spiderman Brand New Day and Avengers Doomsday. Things seem promising this year. 

Distro Hopper - Bazzite

I have been distro hopping quite regularly, and while my gaming machine came with Windows 11 pre- installed I installed Pop OS on it to try Steam games through Proton. Pop OS does play quite a few games compared to other distros and yet I was not satisfied. At that time I was using Zorin OS on my older gaming machine and Fedora on my Thinkpad. I recently decided to switch it up and installed Pop OS on my Thinkpad and Bazzite on main gaming machine and I have never been happier. Bazzite, I ended up realising, is beautiful, most games on it play out of the box just like Windows and all the tools a gamer would need are in-built, even caffeine that you would require while downloading games on steam so that your computer doesn't sleep. I mostly use computer for my thesis, clinic work, writing and gaming. I had been away from gaming for a while when I went to college so the first thing I did in mid 2010s was getting all the games I missed out on. I like open source and I frequently donate to open source projects which includes Linux and its distros, Wikipedia and online public domain book libraries like  Project Gutenberg. As of now, Bazzite has blown me away, what a beautiful distro for gaming; writing, anyway I can do on other distros and if MS Office is required, on Windows.

Adventure Island

The most beautiful thing about political persecution that I came to know about is that it doesn't have to be based on concrete things, it can be as whimsical as it comes. While I recognise political persecution as mental health issues, other people in this country would recognise it as just life. In 2013, and events unfolding in my life post it, I ended up realising that people in this country, or at least the place I hail from is ruled by genocidal rapists who employ more criminal rapists for crowd control at a deeper level. I had education is psychiatry so I could analyse things going on with me and my mind, and ultimately when realised the real truth I realised that if I speak about it people would think of me as crazy which is by design as the truth of the situation is unbelievable and as soon as one speaks it, he or she gets discredited by the very act. There were some things that were diagnosed as schizophrenia, later by early 2000s world wide cases of gang stalking and remote neural monitoring started to appear, again diagnosed by psychiatrists as schizophrenia or paranoid behaviour. These individuals called themselves as "targeted individuals". It just surprises me how linguistically accurate these terms are. Gang stalking is actually gangs of individual stalking a person, remote neural monitoring is actually remote monitoring of the nervous system and targeted individuals are in fact targeted. Though when we read the accounts of targeted individuals form the western society, we end up thinking that it is something isolated. That these are individual cases. I read books on these subjects two of which, "A New Breed" and "Guinea Pigs", were by an anesthesiologist from the United States who himself was a victim of gang stalking and he ended up writing his account in these two books though he underwent his ordeal in the mid 90s and made the mistake, again, of thinking of what was happening to him as targeted and isolated instance. The truth is everyone of us is a part of it. If someone feels something supernatural or "occult" happening, one has to realise that miracles too only favour the rich specially in the India of today. The truth that I ended up realising was that it's just a slavery perpetuated by the rich, at a level way deeper than it is possible to imagine and most people can't overcome or bypass the control and those who are part of this setup do not have to. I ended up realising that in this country it is a feudal-corporate axis and that religion is actually a scam and is practiced as a scam. I realised that these motherfuckers do anything they want with people and name it their fate or karma and it is how things in Purvanchal go, it's all about victim blaming and blame shifting at at a cosmic scale but since it is done by a feudal entity instead of a refined entity like a Christian church, it just shows as the main job of these motherfuckers is exploitation of people, social engineering of families and people's personal relationships and hate based whimsical torture of people. I got a chance to observe this setup when while living in Bihar I started to feel being "gatekept" from Western literature, media and even western food items. These bastards are so drunk on power, and of course they would be because the power dynamic is totally non-negotiable, that they do not even bother doing their homework while trying to sabotage someone. In the past decade I ended up realising that these bastards whimsically rape people, murder them and ruin families and there is no concept of accountability or responsibility for actions in this gang. It's network, and it's scattered just like intelligence but the actors in this "intelligence" setup are all unofficial so people and families with history and culture perish and people think that it was fate. I ended up relearning my personal history from a whole different perspective which included not having access to cable television during my early childhood (which was due to the simple fact that my home was in the outskirts and cable hadn't simply reached there), then it became about having access to a computer and books and such things, I realised that it is in fact retrospective persecution and I had come way too far from "gangstalking". I ended up realising that these motherfuckers facilitate people of their castes by manipulation of memory and cognitive functions and it kind of amused me, imagine having access to people's physiology and souls and yet think purely on materialistic basis and about pussy and money and it made me realise that lower castes and women of this country in fact are actually oppressed. The best thing that I realised, however, was that the control, which is in fact absolute, can be bypassed once one's subconscious realises about it. I realised that mind and consciousness too just like the body have an immunity that rejects external influence as soon as it realises it and it is this reason the control has to be continuous. So, gangstalking and remote neural monitoring are not something isolated, it's is the part of the structures that rules over us, a feudal-corporate structure with the mafia, religion and government as its arms and politicians, godmen and criminals as their lackeys while the main oligarchies, take their decisions. It's a multi-level setup starting from villages and going up to the national and even international level and this is how you get women possessed by "Devi" in the villages. It is one hundred percent biopolitical control with religious being it's chief and main tool. The setup is decentralised so making sense of it is very very difficult. The state of Purvanchal is pathetic as wherever I went in this country they attempted to humiliate me for belonging to the region, so I ended up realising that these motherfuckers humiliate people from their own region and are basically and essentially pimps who sell people from their regions to other regions. I was in Varanasi in 2017 and a famous daily newspaper and news website, the name of which starts with "Dainik", now a media group, tried to gaslight me in front of my clinic. It's sad but this is what it is. Every institution in this country is complicit in the exploitation of people. One has to realise that we live in a setting where all your childhood and emotional traumas, secrets and inferiority complexes, low self-worth, self-doubt and poor self-image will be exploited to make you do the bidding of this structure, intimidation and blackmail are common. The torture is infinite and they will keep torturing you and downplaying the torture and it may also include torturing your loved ones. Existence of God in this kind of a setting is impossible, but he or she must be there as a principle as these motherfuckers are demonic. I by now have realised that it is actuallythe rich, unfortunately they are empty inside and hence they are feeding on souls of people who have roots, history and culture. These motherfuckers shat on everything this country ever stood for. 

Invasive

I wanted to be psychiatrist and a medical physiologist, I was studying to be a medical physiologist in 2015 after completing my graduation and was going to pursue psychiatry as a specialisation later. I had interest in psychosomatology. Later, due to several reasons I had to switch to hospital administration. Though my desire to pursue psychiatry, which of course was due to the desire for helping people and physiology were both answered by the politics of our beautiful country. The ultimate realisation about psychiatry is that it is a redundant subject and discipline in the India of today, people are being managed by pumping sensations and vibes in them and it is how you visit Varanasi and feel the "divine" vibe of that actual shithole while the common person especially lower class only feels pain and depression. There is no doubt that at least eighty percent of mental conditions are political persecution and so for quite a lot of people, delusion of persecution might not be a delusion at all. The deep politics of this country is mostly feudal in nature and has folded over itself because of the simple reason that these motherfuckers first shit over the society and then take that shat over social reality as the actual reality as the new reality, it's a shit cycle in which reality keeps getting progressively worse except for the "elite" who feel the same "vibe" like the "divine" vibe that tourists feel in Varanasi permanently in their lives, sort of in a Huxley's Brave New World style like a kind of neuropsychological air-conditioning. India is a lot about performance and less about substance because these motherfuckers spent their lives copying the whites. I personally would prefer the natural breeze over my skin than the neuropsychological air-conditioning but the bad news is that even the ability to feel the natural breeze over the skin can be withheld from people as it happens in the cases of hyperaesthesia, fibromyalgia and chronic fatigue syndrome which again are conditions very neurological in nature. I mean I would have argued for civilizational knowledge systems be developed and for Indian philosophical discourse but it is redundant when people are literally being controlled by pumping thought complexes, sensation complexes and "vibes". Of course the truth remains that people now a days "don't feel like" going out and order through food delivery apps and quick commerce apps and that if you fall sick you are on your own, rape however remains to be only constant reality. 

Chinnamma Chilakamma

There are different components of minds mentioned in different philosophies, both eastern and western. Though I don't think those classifications now are useful. Living in a surveillance state that functions through unofficial actors and poses as a welfare democracy. Here is what the mind is in India instead of a combination of manas, buddhi, chitta, ahamkara and I have made a model of it: imagine your mind being a 3 dimensional vessel and a 3 dimensional snapshot of it can be taken every unit time with the thoughts and ideas present in it. It sounds crazy, isn't it? We live in surveillance state where our personal and family histories are saved and are manipulated in real-time and can be manipulated in retrospect. People's fates are sealed, and unfortunately it's criminals who are actually ruling over people. It's a combination of crime, politics and neuropsychology with criminals having access to people's and women's bodies. I love how things have actually played out in my case. I started experiencing gatekeeping from Western food items, books and literature and western media when I was living in Patna, Bihar, which I had never experienced in my life, and I would think this is one of the most probable places one would experience this but ultimately it all ended up being related to my hometown. I ended up realising that hometown is ruled by rapist criminals and that I was essentially homeless but so is everyone else who is not part of this, for the lack of a better word, establishment. Existence in Purvanchal can be essentially compared to gangrape, which is what it actually is. I ended up realising that religion and rape are in fact related. It's a huge fraud that is being pulled on people, while the basics remain as sex and money in form of exploitation and rape. I have been in medicine for long enough to realise that there is no God for poor but the beauty of the country we live in is that even prostitutes in red light districts of this country light incense in front of God at least once a day. Bihar was the place of enlightenment for me, and I ended up realising that this shit is centralised, all of it and there is no bigger picture to it though the illusion of bigger picture is always shown to bait people. It's the kind of individuals who scooped eyes of children to make them beg on streets, that have access to yours and your loved one's minds. Once personal autonomy collapses only identity remains and this identity is then exploited by the so called "establishment" of this country which makes prostitutes pray and be thankful for their lives. India is profoundly ugly country and it is disappointing because it had a civilizational past. The game is is as simple as a ganging up for retaining power. I'm not an anti-establishment person at all but I think one should have their priorities and stand clear if they are being ruled by uneducated and incompetent genocidal rapists. 

Kundali

After getting enlightening about the political reality of this country I had been searching for a proper method of meditation. The ultimate reality is that the thoughts in one's head might not even be theirs and if this is the case watching one's feelings, emotions, sensations and responses becomes absolutely necessary. The best news however is that the subconscious, as far as I know, can't be colonised as of yet, but in majority of cases one has to salvage it from under the rubble of social, political and socio-economic delusions. If one is able to achieve that, one can work on their real priorities given the situation of the present world, family should be chief among them. No other kind of meditation except watching one's, thoughts, feelings, sensations, emotions and responses are useful and it really takes a lot of practice and knowing oneself to really make out of these thoughts, feelings, sensations emotions and responses are really yours, a sound advice would be to wait for a moment before responding in a social setting. We have to realise in the current political scenario that our DNA is our global AADHAAR card and that depending on the political circumstances, our autonomy can be a hundred percent hijacked and when that happens very few might be able to salvage enough autonomy to be functional. The game, of the entity that rules and sabotages people, is simple zero percent autonomy of one's mind and body, and hundred percent responsibility and accountability of one's thoughts and actions, it is as someone does bad "karma" and fills your account of the social credit system and your nerves and memories keep the account of this induced false third-party filling of bad karma in your "social credit" account. It took me more than a decade to decode this setup and I realised that the basic goal is nothing but rape, manipulation and exploitation through blackmail, victim blaming, intimidation and other such methods. One realises that if one's minds and bodies are accessible to lower-class criminals who one wouldn't allow even hundred kilometres near their family, the culture and civilization of this country is done with. These are enforcers and intelligence of local feudal lords, mafia, gangsters and politicians who are connected above to corporations, industrialists and oligarchs in a multi-level fashion. These motherfuckers exploit first and give people reasons for their suffering due to the the exploitation later, that too, totally fabricated pulled out of their assholes, reasons. Suffices to say that progress is an illusion in this setting and bullet trains are going to do nothing when one doesn't even have access and right to their own bodies. The worst part of all this is that these motherfuckers are whimsical, they don't need any reasons to target people except hatred which in most cases is baseless as the power dynamic is so absolute that they are by now habituated to whimsically raping and murdering people and social engineering and manipulating people's family and social relationships. There is not much that can be done in this kind of setting. The country is a democracy in the outlook, but actually it is absolute totalitarianism at a level way deeper and it is sporadic. So the bottom line is that only meditation that helps is watching one's thoughts, feelings, sensations, emotions and responses. The truth is simple, these are the same individuals who raped women in families of lower castes for entering in temples and pulling water out of their wells, thankfully it was Purvanchal and I was able to make out otherwise delusions are so numerous which include time-travel, witchcraft and so many other metaphysical sabotage designs that if the basics are not clear one would keep spiralling with the ideas and ultimately end up sabotages their lives. The bottom line is, it is a feudal-corpoarate axis with the government, mafia and religion as its arms arranged in a multi-level setup the lowest level of which starts as villages. In this country as I was able to observe it's basically scenario of monkeys with laser guns. It's hilarious. People's fates are either pre-decided or decided in real-time by criminals and one realises that all the kundali and horoscope bullshit is actually bullshit. The control as I ended up realising in the past decade is centralised so all the religious and political drama amounts to nothing but bullshit and these motherfuckers are doing anything the want with people. It's basically a kleptocracy in the guise of democracy. It sounds batshit crazy and paranoid but my job is leaving the record of what I have seen and observed in the past decade. 

Playground

How does a common man think? That those who have power behave responsibly, even I used to think that, about industrialists, politicians corporations and other individuals with power, that they know that there one decision affects lives and create life and death scenarios for millions of people. It is in the past decade that I realised that these individuals have zero sense of responsibility, that the benevolence and social responsibility is just a facade. Muslims in this country have always fascinated me, they are fifteen or maximum twenty percent of the population and yet they are always in the news and in the media compared to other religions such as Christians, Parsis, Buddhists and others. Now, if this is so there are two scenarios why this might be the case, one the politicians use them as cannon fodder and vote banks for their political purposes or two, that they have transnational ties that allows them to assert their presence in the national politics and remain in the news. Whatever the case maybe, lower class Muslims act as cannon fodder as it is them who are mobilised for ground work and it is them who suffer. I spent my childhood in a Muslim majority town, and I know that all my friends were great and I don't say this as tokenism, it is true. They are my friends till date. I have heard stories that earlier in my family Muslims were my relatives, they were the Rajputs who had converted to Islam and yet maintained the ties with the family and used to come to attend functions like weddings only difference being that their Hookah would be seperate. The issue is not the common god-fearing, hard working Muslim. The issue is the ideology. Gandhi had already said in the 1940s, "Ishwar Allah Tero Naam" (God and Allah are both Your names). The truth is that a non-muslim would readily believe this statement it won't happen the other way. India as a nation lost a huge chunk of land to Islam in 1947, the land that was lost is now known as Pakistan and Bangladesh, and politics along with a lot of things, is a lot about land. The Islamic ideology provides its followers a second citizenship of sorts that is to be treated as the primary citizenship and the goal of every at least radical follower is establishment of a Islamic caliphate over the world. Islam provides the most powerful motivation as well as incentives to wipe out and humiliate other cultures, and this is how Zoroastrianism from Persia, and Hinduism and Buddhism from Afghanistan were wiped out. We all see the state of Persia and Afghanistan today. Pakistanis and Bangladeshis consistently suffer with identity crisis, naming Arabs, Turks and Central European Muslim invaders as their ancestors and this is happening today when DNA testing is possible. Pakistan even names their weapons and missiles based on foreign invaders, such is the identity crisis. The whole thing however as we know it was created by the British so that India never recovers, and it never did because of the two-fold game one partition India and two places your coolies in control of the nation. Fast forward to 2026, the culture and civilization of this country along with its hyperreality has collapsed. Country become extraction hub while false narratives of progress are sold by the media which itself is sold. People have forgot to love and showing love and emotions in this country now invites ridicule and helping others now invites consequences. India, as the British gave power to cowardly bootlickers who are infinitely cruel and extractive, now only exists on paper just as all its progress is. The elite travel the world including the West and Middle-east, send their kids to foreign universities while people fail to get basic infrastructure and even clean water and air in the country. I have had the luck in the past decade to clearly see that those who rule this country, their entitlement doesn't really match their competence, and I realised that they can't make out the difference between respect out of fear and genuine respect and so one realises that these are in fact the exploiters and extortionists of the your who extorted and exploited enough to be able to afford finer things in life and continue to do so at the expense of common people who just want to do their jobs and live peacefully with their families even which seems exceptionally hard for them. The deeper modus operandi in India is climbing the ladder and locking the door behind you. While that is not the problem, the problem arises when people who do not want to climb ladders and just want to do their job peacefully are needlessly disturbed and even raped. I have seen it, and I now know that the culture and civilization of this country that lasted for thousands of years has now collapsed. There is nothing that can be done about it. What remains is a layer of philosophical and religious bullshitting over invisible exploitation and rape. And it's not BJP, it has always been Congress, BJP just got the symptoms out as it was their time to make money, and as life of common man becomes more difficult by more needless rules for people who are too uneducated to understand them, Doordarshan keeps commemorating Birsa Munda on his birth anniversary. 

Lemonade

Keeping it real is the most important thing. Societal pressure and peer pressure can be tremendous but one has to learn to say what they want to say, in a way that doesn't offend but puts the point clearly across. We are sum total of everything we have witnessed, experienced and learnt, along with our conditioning, needs, wants and desires and while we might want to hide our needs, wants and desires and it is kind of required too because the society is exploitative, when we become awake enough we realise that the deepest and highest structure in this country is itself exploitative. We have to think of our life as levels of security and encryption like internet, low level criminals can't break through encryptions but white collar criminals can but at least the lower levels are eliminated through encryption, but while we might not express our needs, wants and desires for the fear of being exploited, we forget to keep it real. The truth is we ooze ourselves, in every word we speak, in every action we do and so we must own all of it, we must, as they say, keep it real. I had my goals a decade ago, I wanted to write literature, I wanted to explore transgressive fiction, Vice style, until I experienced the bottom line and the truth turns out that the actual bottom line of the reality is in itself is transgressive, more corrupt than any fictional noir city and people are only saved by their individual delusions bubbles within bubbles of mass delusion perpetuated by the entity that exploits them. So, one realises that there in fact is no terraforming mars. Not for the majority at least. When we will reach Mars, there will be Mosques despite the belief that earth is flat and people will pray with their faces towards Arabia. This is the actual state of the world at present. Science is important, but it is in Roman and latin scripts mixed with sprinkling of Greek and it is standardised science. Hegemony ultimately starts to show itself just like we ooze ourselves with our words and mannerisms. There is no issue with having roman script, latin and Greek in science, none at all unless inclusion of other cultures keeps happening gradually, Rajasaurus is proud of being more ferocious than T Rex. But linguistics of science is less important than the matter at hand at present, that is science slipping away from hands of common people and only remaining as pseudoscientific fitness and nutrition reels on Instagram while real science goes in the hands of Brahmins of today, whoever they are. Science and technology are religious scriptures of today and top secret labs are the temples in which the lesser mortals would only enter at the cost of getting raped. It's not going to end well, but then people like Nietzsche and Bertrand Russel always knew it, they wrote because they still had optimised buried beneath the rubble of philosophy, good men are always optimistic. Kind of funny how so many people are branded as absolute evil and yet none of them broke the hands of Indian weavers and broke the back of Indian peasants by extracting the life out of them. It's people authenticity being extracted in our times, it's the individuality that is oozing out as people are being squeezed like a lemon in a squeezer, so one's got to make sure that what is coming out is purely and authentically them. 

Write Concepts #23

It took me a while to arrange my writing habits. A handwritten journal, a digital journal a personal blog and then writings on Substack and Medium along with a Tumblr and a couple of websites. I had decided quite a while back to write about what actually matters and as far as fiction is concerned, focus on world building. I talk in bottom lines because according to me if the bottom line is not right everything is redundant, especially when the deepest and highest structure of this nation is corrupt and criminal. I have a bunch of projects in pipeline for 2026. A flash fiction project, short stories and short story series, and a couple of novellas. Novels are still a far cry given my writing block so I might just focus on the novellas for a while now. Writing needs effort, not that it actually needs it but because of the political setting we live in. I mostly wanted to write escapist romps and pulp-literary kind of entertaining stories in genres like noir, adventure, steampunk, cyberpunk, mythofantasy and speculative and science fiction. I still hope to do so despite writing blocks. It's been a while I have written flash fiction but that's where I think I must start. I think I have written enough of deep political setup of this country and if I write about anymore it would be only to warn people, expose the mechanics and equip the people against deep manipulation and exploitation. I have realised that deepest structure of this nation is not only corrupt but also exploitative and going by books of John Hall, like A New Breed and Guniea Pigs, it's the same in the US so it kind of seems like a world standard though it is especially demonic in India because people are deprived of the basic and due to the lack of education the power dynamic is non-negotiable. My goals for writing is still the same entertain and educate while trying to make the reader feel and provide them warmth and comfort for the most part. 

Vidyapeeth

I kind of feel that I'm done with diagnosing the deep political system of this country, and rather not go deep in it as there is nothing to go deep anymore. The truth is money and sex in form of exploitation and rape and everything else is embellishments. Exploitation is inevitable and so once in a while I might write detailing on the methods and approaches to counter them as much as it is possible. While it might seem the sex and money bottomline in form of rape and exploitation is particular to Purvanchal deep politics, I don't really think so. I think it's applicable on the greater nation as well. The most unfortunate thing about all this Varanasi, considered to be the seat of knowledge and spirituality, is in Purvanchal, effectively making religion a scam. These bastards destroyed Hinduism, my beautiful syncretic culture and the most baffling thing was the realisation that in Purvanchal there is biopolitical control of nutrition and food especially with women, people are deprived of things as basic as food and of course the finances too are controlled. This, is absolute totalitarianism at a biopolitical level and further stratification of an already stratified society, though the ultimate strata remains just one and is defined by impunity, whims and capriciousness. I have had an encounter with the individuals in this setup and they are such that a common man wouldn't keep them even a hundred kilometres near their family and unfortunately these scum exert biopolitical control over people's including women's bodies. It works by employing lower class criminal scum as, for lack of better words, criminal and intelligence operatives, against the middle class who are effectively being disarmed by sabotage of their linguistics, literature and culture and by brainwashing them for aspirations that are simply not achievable in sealed stratas except for those who sell their souls. The fun part of it all is I had no business in this shit and was dragged on it like they say in Hindi, pigs dragging you to their muck, though I did what I had to after being dragged in the muck. A common man doesn't want much, a job, a partner he can vibe with, to take care of his family and financial and social security, none of which are actually achievable in this country except in form of a delusion that one keeps trying to keep together. In Purvanchal as I realise being able to work to earn money, is also a privilege, so the inference is that this is essentially slavery. I'd rather focus on my interest, chief among them are nature and universe and of course what is left of literature and science. 

Snowpiercer

One has to realise that only thing that matters is the present. This is the absolute crux of existence. At the deepest level people are under individuals who feel entitled to their bodies and who feel entitled to rape them. It kind of doesn't make sense because it is too unbelievable to be true, but ultimately this is the truth. I conceptualised the arrangement of society as I saw it, as basically a three tiered glass ceiling arrangement. There is a top, neck deep in excesses and depravity then there is an executive branch at the second hierarchy. Imagine the glass ceilings having holes in them from where the top as well as the middle or executive level passes thrusts spears in the common people, the best part is, based upon their whims and fancies. I have had a complete overview of the setup and these individuals do not hesitate in changing past and family histories of people just based on their whims, though it could also have been excusable if these bastards weren't thoroughly incompetent. Here is the bottom line, it's a feudal-corpoarate setup with the mafia, religion and the government as its arms and it is arranged in a multi-level setup, lowest tier of which starts at the level of a village. The state of Indian religion, upon knowing its true condition baffled me. Of course foreign intelligence agencies are involved in this shit, my guess would be Russian and American agencies and they have succeeded in destroying the cultural and civilizational fabric of our land because the British had already laid the groundwork by transferring power to their coolies who continued their policy of extraction, exploitation and divide and rule and who sell their souls at the drop of a hat. Now the pathos of feudal exploitation meets corporate extraction where village style sexual exploitation of young boys and girls continues with LGBTQ+. These motherfuckers couldn't build proper systems, one because they are incompetent and second because no system is required as they think of people as animals and themselves as Gods, the bad news is that even the lowest level low value criminal scum employed by these motherfuckers, thinks like this. I love idea of India, I have a strong belief that Indian constitution is one of the most beautiful documents in the whole world. But this country actually works on biopolitical control exerted by feudal-corporate axis which is whimsical and capricious. The chaos of the country that looked endearing without the knowledge of reality now looks extremely ugly once one realises that it is the result of mindless exploitation by thoroughly incompetent and criminal assholes employed by the rich. 

Dredd

It's kind of funny that people in this country live in a setting where those who are supposed to judge them can't even judge them correctly. I know this after years of tribulations, but unfortunately I don't know if this is by design or not. Though what I have seen and experienced in the past decade it actually seems to be by design. I, in the past decade, have been able to see a level of incompetence coupled with entitlement that I hadn't imagined in my wildest dreams. Corruption anyway in this country was a given but I realised that it is so deep that it reaches the very soul of this nation and consequently the souls of people. I ended up realising that individuals who decide the reality of this nation and consequently realities of people are themselves out of touch with reality and this whole nation at the deepest level is being run on Pavlovian psychology, a kind of psychology that is used to control animals. I level of cognitive dissonance these megalomaniac Western copycat assholes experience when they see someone actually competent is hilarious. Cognitive dissonance if experienced during an encounter with truth is indicative of delusion and one can imagine that if the assholes running this nation are deluded, probably, again, due to being drunk on megalomania and disconnect from reality what they must be doing to the people. In the past decade I have realised that merit in fact in this country is thoroughly a scam. These motherfuckers are facilitating their family members and their castes to positions of power and privilege, and I do not in the least think it to be wrong. What baffled me was how deep a level it is happening at. This shit is happening at a level common people think of as domain of God. It is essentially modern day slavery and it is worse than slavery of the olden days because it is way deeper, and for the people who are not enlightened at the deepest level. Imagine working on the level of souls and yet having your priorities as money and sex in the form of exploitation and rape. I ended up realising that all struggle is futile. People end up where they have to because the control is totalising. For a lot of unfortunate people even their autonomies are sabotaged so that their free will collapses. Imagine this scenario people having zero autonomy on their thoughts, actions and lives and yet a hundred percent responsibility of them. When this happens one realises that the suffering they are going through is due to their individuality which hilariously is sabotaged, and one ends up realising that suffering has only one basis in this country, intimate whimsical hatred the intimacy of which kind of contradicts the Pavlovian biopolitical control. It's actually the worst case scenario where people are mindlessly manipulated, raped and murdered based on whims of thoroughly incompetent individuals but it becomes the best case scenario as one realises that nothing can be worse than this and then they can focus on what truly matters to them, chief of which would be family. 

Aadhaar

Politics is mainly about identity. I, and people of my era, grew up in a different time. My generation has seen letters being sent through post, basic telephones, dial-up modems, mobile phones, and now 5G and even Starlink. The way the world is unfolding it seems that Machines thinking in the movie The Matrix, 90s to be the zenith of humanity largely seems to be true. In the 90s there was just enough technology, there were basic phones and basic mobile phones and dial-up internet with email and Yahoo Messenger, and that was technology was more than enough. Now if you google something you get related products ads in your social media, and a lot of times even when you talk about it to your family. Social media for the most part is free, and so the maxim that if something is free, you are the product sounds about right. The condition of humanity now is like pigs in pigsty who are forced to eat needless shit, fattened and then slaughtered while the politics like George Orwell's Animal Farm continuosly goes about. The time I grew up in was different, although I now realise that exploitation was still intimate even back then, there was no force feeling of products and narratives back then. The choices were limited and those limited choices still were good enough, human warmth back then was still a thing. I could watch 50 First Dates or American Pie on Star Movies, or even Harry Potter, and believe in it. I grew up in a time when I could think of getting away from my family and making a name for myself, the idea of teenage kids in foreign throwing newspapers and becoming self-reliant and working and paying for their college, during my teenage was aspirational and I felt that I too could do that. All these things are simply not possible now. People's identities now have become their FASTags that allow them access to the expressway of progress. Society is now a panopticon where individuals who watch you eagerly wait to commit some sort of mistakes to "punish" you which is, as I ended up knowing, is just sadistic torture. Those who don't make mistakes are ultimately framed. There are two levels to this country, a visible level existence and a deep existence, and at deep existence everyone is violated, at least every common person, no one is spared. It's a very bad case of Stanford Prison Experiment that has been going on in this country, especially since early 2010s. People have stopped sharing their lives and have started selling them. Becoming an adult is realising that there are people in the world who have casteism, regionalism, misogyny and hatred coursing in their veins and the unfortunate news is that it is these individuals who rule over people. They fail to grasp the simple fact that once people's bodies and minds are violated, things like caste, region, religion stop to matter, but then these are the individuals who create facts, false facts but facts nevertheless. A lot of adults of our times are regressing into their childhoods, I myself decided to rekindle my childhood love of comics as there is nothing interesting in the world anymore for me at least. Politics is about identity and if one is unlucky they are going to suffer every shred of every identity they belong to, in the same way a mullatto suffers for his black ancestry but fails to get the privilege of his white ancestry. It's a negative sum game for most of the people, and especially those who refuse to sell their souls. When one gets the idea about the reality of the world, family becomes the first and last bastion of identity. 

Blinders

It’s kind of funny that I wanted to be a physician-writer and in some ways I became one. I still do not consider myself a writer though I do write very regularly. A time came when I ditched conventional publishing and decided to publish on my own, on my blogs and I might even end up publishing any books I write by myself. I’m wary of being a part of a cabal, a clique or a circlejerk until and unless it is just a group of friends who just like chilling out and having fun together. Writing is not an easy thing, though it looks easy. It is only easy to the privileged, for common individuals it comes about by walking. Mastery in anything is a result of privilege or through suffering, toil and relentless hard work. I prefer the latter but in the times we live in, most of the present masters in any field are products of privilege and a lot of them can be called as charlatans whose mastery is dependent on secretive access instead of synthesis of their field, hard work and struggle. People have been realising this now and so they have stopped respecting the ones in power and hence respect now is artificially extracted from them. Original insights are a byproduct of continuous struggle combined with original thinking and while struggle is not unknown to people of this country, original thinking is rare because it rarely goes unpunished here. It kind of sucks that by the time I became the age of becoming a writer, writing and reading became redundant. I never wanted to become a writer for going to books stores and lit fests and signing my copies, this is capitalism. I wanted to become a writer so that people learn from my books or get entertained from them. I have always respected pulp writers more than booker prize winning ones. The truth is that a good writer knows that for the majority life is terrible and why would he then write a depressing book that makes people experience terrible things about life? There are exceptions, like Kafka, Orwell, Huxley, Philip K. Dick and others, because they dealt with absolute truths. They presented, even if through metaphors, the truths that they encountered. The truth that they presented only ends up in two ways, diagnosis for suffering or death. Though the truth is that once one comes to know the actual truth of the world, death starts seeming to be a valid option. What a writer writes becomes part of the system and it is then used to groom or manipulate the reader, so a writer who is true to his craft must always write in a way that his words can’t be used to gaslight or manipulate the reader. If writing is meant for entertaining, it should entertain and equip people and if it is for knowledge it should, again, help in seeing clearly. The ultimate choice the writer has at the end of the simulation is to either kill the injured horse or tend to him until he becomes well again and a writer should make sure that he should, always tend to the horse and at the same time remove its blinders. 

Bazics

The base reality of India is so ugly that when one truly witnesses it he can't really stop from becoming cynical but here one has to do the work for not ending up cynical or bitter. There are two types of people on in the world, those who litter and those who put the garbage in dustbin, those who waste food and those who do not. I ended up realising that world is ruled by individuals who litter, who waste food. It is not as simple as I have made it but concepts need to be simplified to be understood. There is abundance mindset and there is scarcity mindset, poor people have scarcity mindset and rich have abundance mindset, the sad part is that this abundance mindset the rich have come at the expense of the blood of the poor. Again, as I said in my oversimplification, there are two types of people, those who do things themselves and those who expect others to do things for them, like the ones who travel to mountains and litter there. This mindset of people has been developed because those who rule this nation want to keep the base reality ugly. Base reality should be ugly so that when people try to climb the social ladder they can be shamed for from where they have come. People do not get contentment in their lives because content people are harder to manipulate, harder to bait. A bait of a better, more comfortable life always hangs in front of people and they keep walking towards it, destroying their present. Life in this country is stratified like the railways and not only life but also happiness, and it is interesting because happiness doesn't require much just enough money for financial security, social security, love and nature. People in this country are conditioned to expect that others will do the work for them and so we get individuals who litter who think public property as their own while using it and of others when the time comes to take care of it. The stratification is like Indian railways where the lower strata keeps fighting for basics and here street-smartness, hypocrisy and cunning instead of kindness and empathy is encouraged. The ones watching over people have extreme hypocrisy where they think that even doing criminal things is there right but room for movement for others keeps getting smaller and they are expected to follow moral absolutism and this moral absolutism is only for people who are already good because the cunning and malicious are already co-opted by the system to manipulate the good. The whole game is on population, on being able to enslave people while the correct ethical framework should be giving people incentives and compensation for the work they do. It is to extract value from people and this value extraction for the system is done by absolutely low value and cunning hypocrites who have different rules for them and different for others. What can be done is having a personal moral code, because exploitation is inevitable and moral codes in the society are vague and while one can see none of the people following them, they can be enforced on individuals based on the whims of those who control the system. The bottom line is that those who follow the rules will suffer incredibly more than those who don't. Here is the political game, there are political preset in form of -isms, those who indilge in excess are branded as capitalists and those who like to share, especially to the needy are falsely accused of being a communist which due to the inherent opposition to sharing the individuals end up apdapting and while the ones sitting in elite spaces preaching communism enjoy their wines and iPhones an uneducated man who got radicalised due to reading pamphlets gets shot in the jungles of central India by the security forces. 

Digital Snan

I have thoroughly enjoyed having an extremely tough life. It has given me insights about the world common people do not have. Suffering builds character, but that only happens when you are already a good man or woman. The realization that the world is not ruled by good people is hard to digest for people who have grown up believing in goodness but it settles in a while and then they adapt by focusing their goodness where they can. Humans are sentient beings and that means they feel pain, the kind of Pavlovian psychology the deep structure of this country uses is about guiding people with that pain, whether emotional pain or physical pain. The deal is to not to be guided by pain. Intimidation is a centralized in this country and one’s really gotta check with themselves if they feel intimidated by someone if they are really feeling intimidated by the person or the structure that enables them. It is a good person’s bane that he has to be right all the time. A good person can’t afford to be wrong, for the sake of his conscience. Though it is equally important that if he is, he forgives himself. One has to realise that there is no reckoning in this world, and if there is, it is staged. There are no reckonings in a cycle of exploitation in which we presently are. Evil should have consequences but it’s actually not possible because it is evil that rules the world, the consequences of evil are all staged. As long as one is alive, they must keep learning and training to be better. A man who has been true to his ideals and principles has nothing to fear in afterlife if he believes in it, I personally do not. It’s a game in which one has to realise that they have to do the important stuff, loving their family, providing for them and improving themselves and learning about the world more each day. The ultimate realization is that those who look beautiful and act classy have become so by snatching the basics from the needy, and by now I have realized that there are no exceptions here, and especially in this country. In the past decade helping someone invariably come with consequences though one must never hesitate to help those who deserve their help if they can. God is important, not because he exists, but it is a concept that provides relief. I don’t believe in a God in a matter of fact way but if you don’t worship your gods you will end up worshipping other’s gods and, sadly, others too. Institutional religion and it has been thoroughly verified by me, in this country, is a scam. But your gods aren’t. They are not scams. They are real archetypes infused with energy that empower you. Gods have been intentionally weakened to disarm people, and this is why no one in North India worships Kartikeya who is god of war but Ram who sacrificed for people and Shiva who drank poison. While people who believe in god keep sacrificing and drinking poison, these motherfuckers keep filling their coffers. God might not exist but He does empower you to keep carrying on. One has to remember that once in this country we were actually being ruled by benevolent people. When our gods still had power. And it is written all over in our mythologies.

It's All About The Game

American professional wrestling is one of my most favourite things to watch. In my opinion it is one of best things to be ever invented in recent history. It mimics the world we live in that it is totally planned and staged, which a lot of kids became disappointed after knowing, but other than that it is one of the most beautiful things ever because it is benign, and not violent like UFC, but the physical stakes are as real as UFC. It requires atheleticism but the beautiful thing is that it also allows the wrestler a chance of cantharis in form of persona or a gimmick. If I'm a wrestler I might choose a shadow self that I am wary of showing the society and wear it as a gimmick for my wrestling life and act accordingly to entertain people. It's a beautiful example of channelization. Indian polity too is like American professional wrestling, it is as entertaining too but it's not benign as professional wrestling is. Indian polity just like American professional wrestling is planned, and so is Indian media and entertainment. The difference is that earlier we used to have absolutely talented people, real, good people with good intent in celebrity spaces and media and entertainment and now it totally comprises of talentless hacks and industry plants, and given their intelligence, only few of them might realise that their job is to keep people stupid. The deeper polity too is quite simple as if it is designed by some State Bank of India accountant. The ones from IITs go to become IAS equivalent for American companies, the ones from tier 2 or 3 colleges become mules for local companies. It's a simple process of allotting human resource of which unfortunately a lot is pre-decided while a lot of kids waste their time in Kota and Patel Nagar. It's directing human resource and it is mathematical because people are not human and all the positions that really matter are through nepotism, cronyism and patronage networks. Life is sealed for common man and it is getting increasingly hard to earn money legally and through hard work. It kind of starts to get funny when literal coolies opt for totalitarianism and absolute control over information but what I got to know is that if you are pathetic you can get away with inflicting infinite amount of torture on people. If pain can be quantified, a person suffering in some poor region of Africa might suffer infinitely more than someone in America and yet the ones inflicting the suffering in Africa might not be treated as with the same standards as one would be held accountable in America. Civilization brings accountability. The issue with this country is that despite having continued civilization since antiquity this country has devolved into a post colonial hell hole and I ended up realising that major of population in this country is kept uncivilized on purpose so that they can be beasts of burden and animals for slaughter with their living conditions like a pigsty so that a permanent prevention on their social mobility can be achieved through shaming them about from where they have grown. It is in fact at the deepest level about money, resources and sex and there is nothing like art in popular media for quite a while now. There is no Hrishikesh Mukherjee and Manmohan Desai now, and there can't be as in the past decade the countries hyperreality has, at least for those who are intelligent enough to notice it, has collapsed. The ones who truly rule this country think of artists as prostitutes and anyone who is aware of the feudal illiterate and entitled mentality of the ones in power in this country knows that. It was always present but in the past decade it has cemented. There can't really be professional wrestling in this country because this country believes in aping and it can't really synthesize something novel as the ones in power are unfortunately as incompetent as they are entitled. Great directors like Priyadarshan and David Dhawan are irrelevant now and the ones replacing them do not have integrity.

Comics Talk

Constantine happens to be one of my favourite comic book characters. There is something tragically sexy about a smoking occult detective in a trenchcoat dealing with hell and demons, another one of my favourites is The Punisher, though as I matured, I realized that he must have an impeccable sense of judgement, especially given his absolute sense of justice, and if that is good all is good. Another one would be Rorschach, again just like Constantine written by Alan Moore. I like characters created by Alan Moore because they have depth and vast scope. Alan Moore is one of my favourite comic writers, another one would be Frank Miller. There are other fan favourites such as Superman and Batman and I like Superman for his optimism in humanity though I don’t share it with him. I’m a fan of comic book movies and I quite like the MCU, the DCEU despite being directed by Zack Snyder wasn’t upto my expectations but I still hope that Netflix after acquiring WB and DC saves it as elseworlds. I recently heard that Snyder is actually pitching a solo Batfleck movie to Netflix as an elseworlds project. I don’t really like James Gunn’s DCU despite having loved his Guardians of the Galaxy for Marvel Studios but I’m hoping for it to change with new entries such as The Lanterns and Supergirl. The project I’m most excited for is Midnight Sons which is in works according to news sources but haven’t yet been announced. The Hawkeye Season 2 has been cancelled according to news reports and I didn’t really feel bad about it as I didn’t like Season 1 either but they could have saved the season by introducing Bullseye from Daredevil, Marvel really needs to understand that characters from two different worlds, like Christmasy world of Hawkeye and gritty world of Daredevil, is what would pull the crowds in. People want to see people from different worlds interact. I really hope Midnight Sons gets made and I would be here for it. At present I’m watching Wonderman and though I’m really hearing a lot of praise for it I haven’t yet gotten to the point in this series where it gets interesting, till now it’s just an okayish drama. My hope, despite me not liking Netflix as a company, is that it keeps DCEU as elseworlds. Superman and Black Adam had too much potential and if Shazam would have been there, as Black Adam and Shazam share their lore, as a comic relief, it would have turned out great.

Tummak Too

Enlightenment about self might arrive at once but enlightenment politics arrives in stages, the first realisation is by chance, that all existence is political and this arrives when the political structure shows itself to you, the rest is when you start seeing existence, places and the world in this new light. I'm thankful for belonging to Purvanchal, not only because it is an originally superior culture which I saw dying in front of my own eyes, but also the torture the structure ruling it has inflicted on me. I have undergone what could only be termed as infinite suffering, and since as a physician I know what suffering means I'm definitely not playing with words here. The tragedy is not that here in Purvanchal people's lives are ruined for nothing, the tragedy is that those who are employed to do this are absolutely low value scum who carelessly play with people's lives thinking of themselves as God. It's similar to a pickpocket who is also a rapist and murderer deciding who you are going to marry. My region and my culture, not only betrayed me for nothing but also got me humiliated by other regions and cultures, which after it happened to me I realised is a common practice in Bihar and associated regions in which my home region would also come. Things become kind of funny when you are expecting Lord Voldemort but the truth turns out to be that it's a decentralised multi-level setup in which pickpockets cum rapists are employed on every family, only term I can use is feudal deep intelligence and they socially engineer your family and socially engineer your finances and relationships. Of course this system of feudal deep intelligence thrives on psychopathology, these motherfuckers are so deep in depravity and criminality that they have crossed the threshold of remaining human. It's malignant narcissism, megalomania and God complex. This system thrives of extremes so imagine a pickpocket cum rapist having infinite megalomania and God complex and with that access to your life. With time I came to realise that this, actually is the real intelligence setup of this country and it functions at the biopolitical level. And that's how the our neocolonial masters keep a highly optimised extraction and exploitation setup, in Purvanchal it is extreme deprivation for common folk and extreme excess for those who have power in the wake of what is yours is mine but what is mine is only mine. It took me some time to realise that my beautiful culture is dead now and what I see at present is just a simulation of what it used to be. The Monsoon Wedding motherfuckers killed my culture and it is all about apperance and none about substance. These motherfuckers first ceate a facade and then take that same facade as real and while doing this shit continuosly these motherfuckers lost the real plot and I find it funny that it has happened because these bastards have access and control of absolute truth.