Towny

Nov 29, 2021

Imaginations. In this world the perspective totally changes when you realise that it’s all slavery. One can be all spiritual but you can’t deal with monsters with spirituality. I love a woman. I love her so much and I want her. She has chosen someone else and that’s a relief because I never deserved her. I could have never got her. It’s a world where women choose men for money. But then women are human and they can choose the fuck they want. I wanted a woman with integrity and I am glad that I got her. Motherfucking journalists, the fourth pillar of the state busy in sabotaging people for petty vengefulness, but real vengefulness is never petty, it’s vengeance and people who have real vengeance are always the most forgiving, because they know that once their vengeance comes out crashing on the opponent it means complete destruction and if they are not right, their vengeance may ruin an innocent life.

So here is the story, in India the State can get involved because of a petty girl problem. A state of 1.35 billion people functions on the basis of pussy. The whole state machinery is mobilised because a small town boy dared to love a big town girl (and did not fuck her). He goes through media gaslighting because of that for whole nine years and continuing. Just for one piece of uptown pussy. While small town girls are mercilessly raped and hanged on trees. So much for this ancient spiritual civilization.

He doesn’t die so the deep-state gets involved, and this boy, realises that love means desire for uptown pussy and this desire for uptown pussy can make him end up as a “terrorist”. Here is what the joke is, the girl was not even uptown, she was just a big city girl, not even an uptown girl, but she was in media, so the media, continued gaslighting him for nine years, and he didn’t go crazy, he didn’t kill himself. He survived to tell the tale. He still didn’t get any uptown pussy in his life. But he got love. A woman who deserved her love. It’s good to find a woman with integrity once in a while, integrity doesn’t require whatever the opposite of a patriarchal society is. It just requires one thing, integrity.

V2K

Nov 30, 2021

Life gets a new perspective. I was in Delhi and I kept getting thoughts of an Indian corporation in my head. I was being heavily gaslighted and thought I was going crazy. It all starts from social media doesn’t it. Suddenly you start fearing social media posts because they seem to start mocking you. You are an idealist, not the philosophical idealist but in that you follow ideals and then there is a page the idealist and shit starts getting real. Culturally illiterate state or corporate (technologists) start mocking your small town culture and roots, but you were never ashamed of your roots, the mocking was only effective because of why it is effective on most good people (why is someone behind my life, why is someone mocking me), I am a doctor, and they stole my research. It’s like the movie Pi, they lift the result of your hardwork and suffering directly from your brain. They steal your research and then blackmail you into silence. The methods, character assassination, threats, mocking, contradicting your thoughts. What’s the point of being a psychiatrist in a shithole like this. I love my culture, but the higher realm is in the hands of literal motherfuckers.

In past 8-9 years, counterculture has been decimated. Indie music is gone or has become truly underground where normal fans can’t reach anymore. I don’t if there was anything real before but at present there is nothing real. Everything is artificial. The present pop culture is not organic but a result of SOPs. Either they have been building the prison or it has been already built and they are just strengthening it with each passing day. I mean why should I give a fuck about that, my life is fine, but can a good man live like that? Real music is gone. The highest an artist can go is not sell tickets but get advertisements and star in a shitty movie.

Emotionally illiterate psychopaths running a country, that too an ancient civilization that taught the world about administration and logic, about spirituality. My sense of reality was being altered but well it couldn’t happen. I am watching this naked shitshow and I have two options, either to grab popcorn and watch it or to resist.

Glass Shards

 Dec 1, 2022

The year was 2013 and the gaslighting had begun. The first part of it was a movie called Sixteen and they were showing me how I belonged to “middle class” and “Bihar”, which I don’t actually. At that time I was feeling this strange fear out of nowhere. They chose a drop out journalist cum corporate wannabe to specifically gaslight me. This guy fakes a larger than life persona on the internet, acts like he is someone great and has a habit of thinking of himself as a great movie reviewer. This asshole also includes years of movies (2021) with the name of movies. The amount of narcissism this dude has, well at least he trapped a chick with this fakeassery™ and ended her genes forever. This is what happens when you are in a fakeass circlejerk disconnected from real India and “announce” that we are not having a baby for environmental reasons as if you are a celebrity, you are not shit. Feel sad about the woman though, she was a catch, but I suppose she was afraid of real men and had self-esteem issues because of her skin colour probably, I can understand because I too have, not self-esteem issues, but I also have my tender points which these assholes have been pressing since nine years.

Let’s come to my women though, I have never trusted women, in my romantic life I have just met one woman with integrity probably two (but I can understand why women don’t have integrity), I have endured subjective suffering to the limit that it elevated me to the level that these assholes totally started hating me. I have taken care of my women and I have given them numerous chances to be better even when I knew that they won’t improve, still I was hopeful. I have taken care of them when I couldn’t take care of myself. But it doesn’t matter if you are a man or a woman if you are good at heart eventually someone will shit in it. I have forgiven them.

I mean I wasn’t even jealous of these assholes. There were some people I didn’t particularly like, and the “puppeteers” elevated them just to fuck with my head, or tried to at least make me feel that. I have never needed someone to elevate me. I did my work and kept myself busy, I chose a corner and kept doing my work and eventually when they couldn’t stop me they had to “limit” my mental faculties artificially.

The so called “elite” of the media is illiterate about their own fucking country and keeps busy in circlejerking each other and playing “The Most Dangerous Game” with the lives of young unsuspecting boys and girl. There is a chick on social media that is reading Ambedkar and exposing herself on social media I mean I am a man and I can’t complain about seeing boobs and ass ever but I only approve when they are shown legitimately.

Acharya

Dec 03, 2021

The imagination gets corrupted by reality. I live in a country where young kids throw stones on passing trains. Toilets in trains are horrendous and a woman who wanted to help the tribals is in jail with several cases on her. I love my country, there are many absolutely beautiful things about my country. The soul of my country is beautiful. The problems in country are all due to politics and administration. I used to think that it’s a large country probably this is the reason it is hard to administer it. But then I saw the reach and power of the state and I realised that the culture is being knowingly degraded. The elite are comfortable in their life unaware of what real India is and they are knowingly destroying the fabric of this country. This country is being knowingly steered into a particular direction in the name of development and there are two things happening at present, westernisation in the name of development and religious and jingoistic fanaticism in the name of nationalism. The rich are being westernised and the politics is becoming fanatic. I have been branded an anti-muslim and a nationalist when I was being tortured. Now let me explain myself here, when I was a kid I used to live in a seventy percent Muslim population town, most of my childhood friends are Muslims (it may seem like a white supremacist saying he has black friends, but the difference is that this is a fact), I am a patriotic person and I would get drafted if there is a war like situation (even after knowing that this country has gone to dogs), I am not a nationalist but yes I am a cultural nationalist. I have no issues with Muslims, actually I have an issue with the wave of Hindu nationalism going on in this country at present, they are trying to define into boundaries a thing that is Hinduism or Indic culture, but I have never been a fan of Islam. Here I am just talking about Islam as a philosophy. It is a philosophy which has the power to take any state back to seventh century, it is a cultural cancer that infects, destroys and swallows other cultures, the fact is that Persia and India actually culturally enriched Islam. But then if I state these plain facts I would be blamed as an Islamophobe so I just keep my mouth shut. The country at present is divided into two halves politically, the Hindu nationalists funded by local Hindu businessmen and the so called “liberals” who are mostly Islamofascists funded by the global left-liberal and Islamist cabal. It staggering how the meaning of the word liberal has changed in the recent years. I personally don’t give a fuck about both of them, because both are political. I only care that innocence of common people is preserved, age old cultures and traditions are preserved without them turning into superstitions or Islam like rigid structure. Hinduism is a Persian word, and I don’t believe in Brahminical methods of Hinduism, I don’t like religions which tell me the correct way to wash my ass. Brahminical Hinduism and Islam being two of the religions which do that.

High Security

 Dec 03, 2021

This blog is for my literary pursuits. I used this blog for metaphysical writing but then the past few posts are about sabotage. I did not want art to get affected but the art invariably does get affected if the oppression and sabotage doesn’t stop. I have had medical training and I couldn’t make up my mind to take up art full-time. At heart I am still a doctor, though my goal for being in medical profession was helping people, a thing which helped my saboteurs in branding me a communist. When you understand the greater system, health or otherwise, you realise that you can only do your bit and in that process earn some money and run your family. I took the damages for whole nine years, I am a medical professional and in India medical professionals are slapped around but still they have dignity, and it was this dignity that made me keep quiet for these nine years of my tremendous suffering. I started with high ideas of helping people, and in the end realised that it is not individual, it is how the system is designed. The system is designed to close in on you if you are not liked. The whole idea of helping people is just a mirage and if you are able to do it, it’s not because you can help people, it’s because the system lets you do it. If you are able to express the goodness in you that too is a privilege, and it’s a privilege because the system is designed to make you feel every fucking little thing as a privilege. You can just do your bit, that’s all you can. One of the assholes who gaslighted me for years decided to teach kids, and I know now that it’s not going to make a real difference in those kids lives, he is just doing it to satisfy his own ego. But if you want you can do it, if you reach hundred kids probably a few of them will make it, and education has more chances of helping people than harming them so, cool. I had the capacity of pulling people out of darkness, I could’ve saved a lot of people, but then since past nine years all my energy went in saving myself from state sanctioned sabotage. I had radical views and I was in medicine and I was a young guy who used to write, so whichever way I came under the radar of the state, be it through entitled sons and daughters of rich assholes or whatever I was perceived as a threat.

I know world is filled with assholes so the rich kids of my age trying to cyberbully me or murder me didn’t come as a surprise, I was not surprised even when their daddies and moms got involved, I didn’t die so the next step obviously was to take it a step further. I was surprised when the state got involved. I got to understand that state itself is composed of these motherfuckers and they are not driven by any sense of duty, as I was in my line of work, it’s just connections. Rich media houses, corporate houses and the people in government, they are all connected, and if they want the system to close in on someone, they can make it happen easily. Sabotage and murder comes easy for these people, the first choice for them was to make me mad and then make me commit some offence so that I can be sent to prison and then tortured there but that couldn’t happen, so they played game of information and psychological warfare with me, with a single individual, they wanted to play the game of blitzkrieg with me, I know two things here, I can’t destroy the professionals because they do that for a living, but I can let them know that I know the defences they use to keep themselves at peace, if they have any conscience left at all, you can’t do anything to the monsters of the lot except for torturing them till they regret their existence when you get hold of them. In these nine years I have properly analysed these motherfuckers, my main goal was breaking the spirit of the rich brats and their lackeys, and with all their machine induced happiness, I don’t think they would ever be able to recover from that while I languish in the prison they created for me with my 100% natural dopamine and serotonin.

Thievery Returns

Dec 2, 2021

It’s all about stories for me. Stories are my first love and that I realised very late in life. How cool it would have been if I had actually not tried to adapt myself to the world but my dad had a role to play in that because all that mattered to him was academics. At this state I realise that academics matter shit in a country where people mental faculties can be limited artificially and by social sabotage. Follow your heart, follow what gives you pleasure and follow what makes you happy, that’s what the bottomline is. My medical studies did not harm me, they made me better, they helped me to take care of myself but what really gives me pleasure are stories. I grew up and I had conflict, between the reality, which is invariably shitty, of this country and my world of stories. The higher class of India lacks indigenous realms when it comes to stories. We have a lot of stories in middle and lower classes, our mythology is rich, but in higher classes it all becomes western. They live western, they copy western, they lift western stories and when they can’t lift, they “remake”. You can get inspired from good art but here in India, the storytellers get more than inspired.

I was in Bombay and the teacher I was training under at that time was “told” that I was similar to “Laden”. Many other people were “told” many things about me, and it is when I did not offend anyone intentionally. The people fucking up my life were rich, but they were not “big” people. I mean who can actually be big with the mentality of roadside trash but then if you are well connected you can fuck up others from “inside”.

At present I feel I have achieved my singularity when it comes to stories and art. I feel the time for Indian graphic novels has arrived and it had actually arrived in the year 2012, but from 2013 there was a sudden shift in the narrative of the country. I like Shekhar Kapur’s graphic novels, his vision of contemporary Indian mythology. Vivek Goel and Shamik Dasgupta have been doing a good job and probably only ones left in the business. Raj Comics which was a part of my childhood now suffers from something I wouldn’t want to talk about. It was hugely disappointing when I realised how many Raj Comics superheroes were “inspired” by American superheroes.

If India wasn’t governed so poorly we wouldn’t have needed escape, but since it is governed poorly, we would need our escape. Since 2013 even that escape doesn’t seem possible probably because of change in the national narrative of the country. Good YouTube channels and filmmakers somehow got trapped in molestation scandals and stopped creating. The ones creating patriotic or nationalist media do not have skill. Recently there was this movie called “Tanhaji”, I mean I did not have high expectations from that movie but still it disappointed me. If a movie is patriotic after 2013, it is most surely a propaganda movie. The nationalists of this country are so less skilled that when they do propaganda it is clearly visible that doing propaganda. They don’t know what art is, and most of them are nationalists not because of love for their country but because they have no choice. Because they have been rejected by the elite liberal circles of this country. They don’t have skill and they are not accepted in the liberal intelligencia of this country and thus in their frustration and powered by Baniya money they keep singing songs of nationalism.

One of the biggest mistakes I have made in my life is respecting people, I can’t help it because I am a respectful person but it eventually backfired on me. From where I did my schooling it was basically every man for himself. I had a habit of loneliness but one mistake I made was thinking that there is hope. There isn’t.

I had thought internet is a tool for knowledge and for connecting. I loved the Yahoo Messenger era of the internet when we could roleplay in the chatrooms, but after that, internet became a huge trap. They have been developing the internet as a huge prison for people. They know about your likes, your dislikes, everything about your personal life and sell you the shit they want. It’s actually not a problem, until they want to destroy you. But then it’s too late, and you have no option but to live in this prison now.

So, in this shitty world, my only escape are stories. Good stories. Benign stories.

Blue Whale

 Dec 2, 2021

Who can do it? You become the lead or some character of a movie. You start seeing patterns, right or wrong it’s hard to tell. You start feeling the movies you watch, you start feeling you are one of the characters, why did it happen? Because you didn’t care about anything else, you were just focused on your work and research. It actually pains my heart, but when you have braved through sabotage almost a decade you realise the exact kind of people whom you won’t show any mercy to. Humanity in me is still alive, after nine years of psychological torture. It was state and corporate resources against one man and they couldn’t do shit. There is a difference between being beastly and being the beast. At present they have resorted to psychological torture by beastly, for the lack of a better word, insects. The best part here is the ones who are torturing me right now have no way of climbing high in society, if they will have children, they will go through the same shit and will be crushed because of what their parents had done. The way they are torturing me is not possible without desire so it’s gonna hurt like hell when they will see themselves getting destroyed. There only defence is hypocrisy, which is also gone when now I have mentioned it. Hypocrisy is a short term solution, adopted by ones who are employed for petty works by their masters.

Now, let’s come to the fight club circlejerk, they thought they are going to teach me psychological warfare, hello? My study of medicine and my principles make me use my skills only positively, for welfare, but when I was being tortured, I knew I am dealing with two types of people, one the vermins who are executing it and the others who had the resources, you can’t do much to the vermin because they are already vermin, but for the psychological fight club loving, psychological warfare flexing, gaslighting, cyberbullying assholes I made sure that in the fashion of ‘come and get some’ they with all their money are psychologically and spiritually reduced to the level of vermin they employed to torture me. It’s fun, because truth has its own power in psychological warfare.

Bird

 Dec 02, 2021

I was on twitter and on twitter you see and learn things, about people, their nature. I was roleplaying a noir character back then because I wanted to write noir stuff. I wrote mostly poetry and transgressive stuff back then. I got into noir and transgressive to sublimate my suffering. I like dark humour but you got to only do it with people who are good at heart as well as have the gall to take it. India at present is going through a crisis. They are trying to artificially steer the culture in a particular direction. There are only two sides to choose. Everyone has chosen one side or the other. Honestly speaking, you have not been given choice of not choosing any side intentionally. Those who used to be poets and comedians are doing political tweets for either one of the two sides. Art is suffering, but then you fear real art because it expands the mind. I will tell you the psychology of how this choosing of one side happens. You are famous, as an artist or whatever and you need support, otherwise you will lose everything that you have built, so you gotta choose. Some of them choose for the circle they belong to. The political humour in this country has become so toxic that it feels that someone is paying them money to do it. A political humourist shouldn’t be afraid, he should either not give a fuck or not do it. Comedy is all about intent, and if your intent is toxic all it will do is spread toxicity in the world. A comedian is exactly the guy who watches world burning with popcorn in his or her hands, because he should always know that he is a fucking comedian not some political activist. I like Russel Peters, because he offends everybody and look what he chose to do with his comedy, bring the world together. He tried to make people realise that the different cultures are not that different afterall. The comedians these days start thinking of themselves as political activists, dude you were already bottom of the barrel, comedians are bottom of the barrel, what makes them artists is their self-awareness that they were bottom of the barrel. Only guy who would choose to be a comedian positively is the guy who genuinely wants to make people happy, make them laugh. Motherfuckers like Varun Grover should not do comedy, he is one toxic mother. He is a damn good writer but comedy is not his cup of tea. These guys have an anti-establishment circlejerk, but when it comes to speaking against Muslims, none of them does it, clearly indicating that that they are part of one of two groups formed in India in recent years. None of them is an equal opportunity offender and Indian population doesn’t have eyes yet to see through this bullshit.

Cue

November 26, 2021

When writing the vibe should be right. If I am doing the project drone I should realise that I should get the vibe exactly right. People trapped in their lives, the Facebook vibe that ruins it for you. You were never fan of the reality, but then it’s what project drone is all about, the Facebook reality. About people climbing the social ladders to be what they hate. You look at yourself from outside. You have been afraid most of your life, of not matching the societal standards. Let’s see the design in detail. You thought you can start anew. Each time, every time, when you are little all you want to do is be better, not applicable on everyone but sure did apply on you. What you thought was depression was actually sabotage. There are steps involved. First create a society in which some things are looked down upon, and then the ones you want to sabotage, make them do the very things, but do it internally in a clandestine manner. Small town ways of sabotage interwoven with the politics of the place. You can’t separate the politics with it. I don’t even want to deal with all of it, knowing how stupid all of this is, I’d rather deal with the government and the deep state than dealing with petty small town political sabotage. Making someone feel that they have ruined the family name. What is hilarious here is that these things are done by people who know none of it matters, or I’ll explain, to function in the way these assholes do, you got to have an image of your victim, the same image a bully has of someone he bullies. People who tell others to be empathetic forget that the only people who can be empathetic are the ones who already are. This is India, and here, the physiological and neurological control of individuals, the access to their privacy is in hands of bullies. Maybe it’s like that everywhere, I don’t know. I have dealt with these assholes so much that I can write a character sketch on them, I have been tortured, by methods including neurological torture, continuous mocking and contradicting and such other methods. Edward Snowden made a worldwide fool of himself but then he made it up by helping millions of fools like himself. I gave the state and the establishment chances, I told them to stop. All I wanted was art and aesthetics and a bit of dopamine, but the ones in the State are not operating on the basis of any policy. They are just doing it for fun. India is an Afghanistan/Taliban on a metaphysical level just the religion is different. The local political sabotage is something I don’t even have words for. They are already bottom of the hierarchy and then they completely morally and ethically corrupt and they have power and they misuse it for voyeurism and torture porn both physical and psychological. The message here is that the deep state only wants to subdue the population, it doesn’t want order or beauty or anything like that, and why should it? I am cool with it, but if it plays out for long, I would like to see how the ones who tortured me would embrace the death of their loved ones, and how would they take torture when it is done to them. It would be curious to see and know. I genuinely want to see that. To be human is to be (I can’t remember the word right now). How do I know it’s political? It’s only politics that knows people and uses their weaknesses to subdue them. It’s only politics that blackmails them to make them keep quiet. It is only politics that is this dirty. Why me? The way it was handled was not even skilled, it was just a play of resources. My life was made free real estate and was trampled, but I broke their souls if they had any. I don’t think they will recover from it in this life

Greenpeace

 November 29, 2021

Imaginations. In this world the perspective totally changes when you realise that it’s all slavery. One can be all spiritual but you can’t deal with monsters with spirituality. I love a woman. I love her so much and I want her. She has chosen someone else and that’s a relief because I never deserved her. I could have never got her. It’s a world where women choose men for money. But then women are human and they can choose the fuck they want. I wanted a woman with integrity and I am glad that I got her. Motherfucking journalists, the fourth pillar of the state busy in sabotaging people for petty vengefulness, but real vengefulness is never petty, it’s vengeance and people who have real vengeance are always the most forgiving, because they know that once their vengeance comes out crashing on the opponent it means complete destruction and if they are not right, their vengeance may ruin an innocent life.

So here is the story, in India the State can get involved because of a petty girl problem. A state of 1.35 billion people functions on the basis of pussy. The whole state machinery is mobilised because a small town boy dared to love a big town girl (and did not fuck her). He goes through media gaslighting because of that for whole nine years and continuing. Just for one piece of uptown pussy. While small town girls are mercilessly raped and hanged on trees. So much for this ancient spiritual civilization.

He doesn’t die so the deep-state gets involved, and this boy, realises that love means desire for uptown pussy and this desire for uptown pussy can make him end up as a “terrorist”. Here is what the joke is, the girl was not even uptown, she was just a big city girl, not even an uptown girl, but she was in media, so the media, continued gaslighting him for nine years, and he didn’t go crazy, he didn’t kill himself. He survived to tell the tale. He still didn’t get any uptown pussy in his life. But he got love. A woman who deserved her love. It’s good to find a woman with integrity once in a while, integrity doesn’t require whatever the opposite of a patriarchal society is. It just requires one thing, integrity.

Thievery

 November 30, 2021

Life gets a new perspective. I was in Delhi and I kept getting thoughts of an Indian corporation in my head. I was being heavily gaslighted and thought I was going crazy. It all starts from social media doesn’t it. Suddenly you start fearing social media posts because they seem to start mocking you. You are an idealist, not the philosophical idealist but in that you follow ideals and then there is a page the idealist and shit starts getting real. Culturally illiterate state or corporate (technologists) start mocking your small town culture and roots, but you were never ashamed of your roots, the mocking was only effective because of why it is effective on most good people (why is someone behind my life, why is someone mocking me), I am a doctor, and they stole my research. It’s like the movie Pi, they lift the result of your hardwork and suffering directly from your brain. They steal your research and then blackmail you into silence. The methods, character assassination, threats, mocking, contradicting your thoughts. What’s the point of being a psychiatrist in a shithole like this. I love my culture, but the higher realm is in the hands of literal motherfuckers.

In past 8-9 years, counterculture has been decimated. Indie music is gone or has become truly underground where normal fans can’t reach anymore. I don’t if there was anything real before but at present there is nothing real. Everything is artificial. The present pop culture is not organic but a result of SOPs. Either they have been building the prison or it has been already built and they are just strengthening it with each passing day. I mean why should I give a fuck about that, my life is fine, but can a good man live like that? Real music is gone. The highest an artist can go is not sell tickets but get advertisements and star in a shitty movie.

Emotionally illiterate psychopaths running a country, that too an ancient civilization that taught the world about administration and logic, about spirituality. My sense of reality was being altered but well it couldn’t happen. I am watching this naked shitshow and I have two options, either to grab popcorn and watch it or to resist.

Red Underwear

November 30, 2021

Sometimes you have to take things in your own hands. The Indian pop culture has always been copied from outside the country. The pop culture has always been at the mercy of rich kids and rich kids idolize the west. The rich send their kids to study in the west. When I was humiliated for liking western pop culture because I was from a “small town” I did not take it personally. The rich who control the pop culture have been shamelessly copying music and stories from the west and now when the internet is widespread they have no option but to “remake” the movies. Forrest Gump is being remade as “Laal Singh Chaddha”, what the fuck is Laal Singh Chaddha, as an artist you can play around with artistic techniques from around the world but these motherfuckers who have millions don’t even have real stories to tell. It’s almost humiliating for a person like me who knows about the Indian culture but these fools don’t even get humiliated, they are as shameless as their predecessors. Hrishikesh Mukherjee is dead, Manmohan Desai is dead, Satyajit Ray is dead and all we going to get now is “Laal Singh Chaddha”.

Drunk Driving

 Dec 1, 2021

It’s not strange that people with money don’t care about stories. All they care about is more money. I love stories, I have loved them whole of my life. Stories matter to me. Good storytelling is important to me. When I was being gaslighted in 2015 by the establishment they took advantage of my writer’s mind. I was preparing to write a book. I think there are two types of psychiatrists, the one who are with the establishment and the others who are not, who genuinely want to help but know that they can’t do anything about it.

Two Bollywood filmmakers who went to personal lengths to gaslight me were Neeraj Pandey and Shirish Kunder. Kunder even partly lifted the story I had written on my blog. How strange that you gaslight a person with his own story. How strange that a drunk asshole who gets slapped around in parties gaslights young boys who dream of helping people.

What to say about Neeraj Pandey, at least his genes are from my area. The people from my area are very patriotic (say nationalist). This guy, if he can make a short film to gaslight me, knows how the establishment functions, and yet he makes “patriotic” films. I mean why would have a problem with it. Everyone has their artistic choice, you can vent your hypernationalism with your art, why would I give a fuck. But if you are a voyeur asshole who gaslights young guys especially if that guy hasn’t given even a thought about you, you are an asshole of the highest order. But being an asshole will apply to everyone in Bollywood probably.

Now let me tell you how it happened. The first guy lifted my story, gave it his own twists and to let me know it was me, he took a Bihari actor, because I was living in Bihar at that time. The second guy, took a Punjabi actress because my girl at that time was Punjabi and again the same Bihari actor.

This network of assholes working in different branches of media, mainly advertising. People in advertising are the worst assholes probably because their art is all about manipulation. Learning psychology of people to manipulate people. I was on twitter at that time and twitter was full of assholes from media and advertising. I should have stuck to Tumblr for my creative purposes but then it’s all just chance. I came across twitter and I thought it would be a good practice and at that time followers don’t hurt. I know that these motherfuckers were from advertising, and I can also assume how it escalated. It was mix of corporate and media, and advertising is where all of it intersects. You don’t tell me how to take care of my women. It wouldn’t have felt bad actually but what really hurt me was how the local establishment of my area and the probably the government got involved. It really shows that a normal person doesn’t have any power. They can crush anyone for funs and games and the government and local establishment will only aid it.

Daddy Cool

Dec 2, 2021

I came under the radar of the “establishment” in 2013. They started gathering intelligence on me since then but then they kept quiet. They were silently gaslighting me through media. The initial approach was shaming me for my class, then came shaming me for my geolocation because I come from an area that is one of the “backwards” areas of the country. I was busy back then, I was studying, struggling with my health and was not comfortable with the stream of education I was in. I wanted to teach Medical Physiology and wanted to research further into neurology and psychosomatology. They kept gaslighting me, humiliating me.

First they humiliated me for my roots, then they branded me a psychopath, then they branded me a “nazi” just because I had joked about Hitler once. I don’t have to explain myself for my Hitler joke but I used to believe and still do that instead of feeling offended for what happened fifty years ago one should care about the present but then how will the agenda carry forward. So, then after the nazi, I was branded a “sexual predator”, despite not doing anything sexual predator like. I have had sex probably 3 times in my life till that time probably. Then they accused me of being a “paedophile” an accusation that makes me nauseous but goes to show you that the establishment could stoop to any level. I really feel for the people who don’t have self-control over themselves because the establishment can make you anything that it wants you to be. I kept on surviving despite not being a fan of surviving.

There was this chick, who while I was on twitter hinted me that I should be honest, with her fake humility and real entitlement, I was not there to be honest I was there for creative pleasure. In fact, the first awareness that I am being gaslighted came through her art. Her art seems devoid of soul and I can’t complain, art is art, if I don’t like an art I would focus on the ones I like. Artists have the right to express themselves. I can’t create art without muses, especially art filled with love, but because of that entitled bitch I thought having muses is wrong, because they had humiliated me for having muses and I had no mental resources to fight back. I was just a soft hearted poet and these assholes were part of a psychological fight club, who used to choose their victims for their psychological games over the internet. It was a classic case of cyberbullying and they thought I am a poet so probably I would kill myself if they push me to the edge but well I was not only a soft hearted poet and thus their daddies had to get involved.

 

Haider

Feb 24, 2022

You watch Haider. You have hope. You are on surveillance and you don’t know it. October 2014 is way further than July 2013. The game is on. You notice Haider’s Oedipus. That was you back then. You tell your girl that you are like Haider. The most beautiful thing about all that has happened? You came to know the truth. July 2013 to July 2015 when you started writing poetry, and it was good poetry even by today’s standards. You did not follow any rules of poetry but you didn’t need to. Two years of surveillance and recording of personal life culminating in Kriti and Ouch. Kriti was in July and Ouch in October, and here was I thinking that the world is mismanaged, I had to correct myself, the world is ‘intentionally’ mismanaged. Pandey might have done that after my wedding but that chutiya Kunder, well, either he could stop time and make his film or it was in the works since before. Before I reached Bombay. But then I could see the glimpse of “eyes wide shut” community, who steal data directly from people’s heads, extract memories and don’t have enough authentic emotions to analyse a person. Where does Bhojpuri fit into all this. It fits somewhere. During Banaras I was feeling Mirzapur. Clockwork Orange was tried. It can happen to anyone and I am glad that it happened with me. Nobody is going to survive this. No one can survive this. A total clandestine method of sabotaging people and who is involved? The media ofcourse. The movie makers. The media conglomerates. They have access to neurological feeds of people I suppose. Without their permission of course. India baby! The media, the movies serve multiple purposes, earn money, gaslight you when you are vulnerable and make you mad and here I was thinking that media and movies were for educating, entertaining and above all for art. There must be a special branch of neurological torture apparatus of the state that drives the narrative and decides what all to keep in a story. India although is not Hollywood. Still, they are getting less and less cultured and more and more “real”. The reality however is due to the ability to access the thoughts and memories of unsuspecting individuals. Normal people are free real estate or cannon fodder, either two or both. India is a monkey with a laser gun. The state, not the country.

Therapy

Jan 27, 2022

The grand internal sabotage of individuals. The data collection, the permanent surveillance. There is a social structure away from the Republic Day parade. There are intricacies to the local culture as well. Strong local beliefs on which the ones sabotaging you function and your job is to nullify that internal belief system. The undeserving Bhojpuri speaking insects sabotaging your life, because they are paid? Or because they can do it? The neurological control needs resources, and who has that? State? Probably the state. The government. Feeding on your fear, reading the quality of your emotions on their monitors? Probably on their monitors because they increase the amplitude of torture based on amount of negative emotions, pain and fear you feel, to maximize the effort. Murderers who are answerable to noone. Real freethinkers of this republic and it is here the republic loses its meaning. Not only the republic but movies on Netflix, Amazon Prime, Hotstar and all other platforms lose their meaning. This is the bottom-line and when you’ve seen this, there is no entertainment, no recreation. A long game being played since atleast 2013, when I exposed myself to the social media, and it was about the class, the ones above the threshold of class are still posting, tweeting, creating with impunity, doesn’t matter which party do they support, but the support is unanimously for Lutyens media, above the threshold ofcourse. Below the threshold it’s about Kirana store and petrol pump mythology. For me it’s not personal anymore, although they made it more personal than they should have, but that only shows the extent people suffer in this “republic”, that too without being aware of it. Living their delusions they don’t know that they are being tortured, manipulated and sabotaged. It happened with me, and if we take 2013 as the beginning point (though it is older than that), my realisation that it’s not me came in 2021. In whole eight years, and this while I was sabotaged and tortured in the background, without my knowledge. You can’t bring something to law if you can’t see it seems to be the motto. I can’t imagine how many people must have “self”-immolated, murdered others, raped someone, under the influence. I am here because I went to Twitter, because journalists, who are mostly the scum of the earth in my experience, must already be, either in the hivemind or under surveillance. Never think Twitter to be Reddit, though it doesn’t matter, because intelligence collection is not the same as history taking. There is a particular feeling of “otherness” to it. You are aware that the world is a big place and one life doesn’t make difference, and so, here begins the “torture-porn”, the game of narratives, the narrative of the real India, the “psychology” of the real India. So much dedicated attention to me, and I can trace it to “Lootera” songs being played in my car. Should I make connections? Between media establishment and neurological control establishment? Who does neurological control establishment belong to, private corporations or the government? Rest was the game of delusions and narratives specifically tailored for me arising from the gathered intelligence, which was result of neurological surveillance, my own writings, and my family history ( with the help of the Purvanchal local (and neurological control)) establishment.

My “history” was “found” out, not for the sake of actually finding out the history but for torturing, humiliating and sabotaging me. Can you feel the “emotions” behind it? Because I can. These are the people who “always get their way”, not because they are good or something, but because they are habituated of always “getting their way”, I could actually see myself from their eyes, and how they see normal people of India, the arrogance and the entitlement. Well, who could be these people? Not the soldiers who sweat themselves on Rajpath at 26 January or who die on the battleground to protect these shitbag motherfuckers. These are the assholes who think of normal Indian people as their slaves, sex and otherwise and won’t hesitate in taking you to ancient Sumeria just to justify their narrative. These are the assholes who watch and record you shitting, fucking, during your intimate moments and during your discussions. These are the assholes who pump you with libido to make you do some sexual offence, and create delusions in your head to torture you and make you believe in some false thing. Compare this with the India you watch on Doordarshan on the morning of Republic Day. They know your romantic relationships, they blackmail you for your sex life, and if you are molested in childhood. They pump emotions in you to make you a wife beater, molester, murderer, suicidal or a rapist. If Tarun Tejpal didn’t intend it, he would know. These are the assholes who sabotage your relationships and friendship so that you can’t survive and rise in the society, these are the assholes who consider themselves above the law and they are because law needs evidence and evidence is nowhere to be seen. These are the assholes who make you psychotic, crazy, just for the kicks of it, Rakhi Sawant would (not) know. These are the assholes who sell you T-Shirts of the bullshit they spout on social media, designating you the monkey of the “monkey and elephant equation”. Some of them have etiquettes and behind that lies a monster. These are the assholes who can brand you a Capitalist, Nazi, a communist, a psychopath, a molester or anything. These are the assholes who can control your physiology.

These are the assholes who have your memories and they will keep bringing the most troubling ones to torture you. These are the assholes who will feed ideas into head to make you act on them. These are the assholes for whom you are cannon fodder. These are the assholes who live a high life with help of machines while you suffer depression and existential crisis. These are the ones who steal ideas from your head, blackmail you into silence and then sell your ideas in the market. Can you guess who are they?

Sacked

 How is it when talking about the “controllers” of your area feels beneath you. No, not the normal people, not even the rich people, but the controllers. I really don’t pay attention to it but if you record every thought, watch every move, see and hear everything that heard for (atleast) nine years, I don’t think predicting him would be that difficult. That’s the beauty of power, and resources, while that person keeps on feeling that he is being paranoid or going insane or suffering from schizophrenia. Syd Barrett had schizophrenia, or did he? The bad job of Indian (local and national both) establishment of judging the individual, couldn’t even do their job properly, for the simple reason that they can’t do their jobs properly. Making a small town guy crazy for a girl? Or because he wrote something about a celebrity on Twitter? Or because what he was writing at that time was “found to be” subversive? It’s all so stupid. I have fulfilled my life’s mission though. Not that I did not know that humanity is like this. I always knew. I just didn’t know that it is like this despite the advancements. For example Russia, I have never been to Russia, but Russia gives a depressing vibe. I am sure TV programs there are highly entertaining, about India it can’t be said even that anymore. If everything is going to be tradecraft internal or external, then souls wouldn’t mingle, only be traded. We all grow up sometime or the other, it’s just that I lost precious nine years of my life, inadvertently learning about tradecraft, sabotage, corporate espionage, industrial gaslighting and state sanctioned (due to private reasons ofcourse) psychological torture. It was fun though, probably the most fun I have ever had. The place I was raised at, people get shot at an egg stall for a 2 rupees egg, and I did not want to die a petty death in a petty streetfight (though establishment desiring, it can still happen), I wanted to know the truth and I think I know more truth than Syd Barrett (I hope so), and Edward Snowden (at least upto the time of writing Permanent Record). The local fools of my area just couldn’t handle my case professionally, and I think that what India lacks sorely in, professionalism. Your job is sabotage, not sadism, but then surveillance is an opportunity for voyeurism and sabotage is an opportunity for sadism, especially if it is neurological in nature and nobody can find out. Do I know more than Oliver Sacks? Not if he turned gay with his own volition.

Interruptus

 Jan 13, 2022

How strange are beliefs. I used to believe once that you need catharsis to function properly but actually you just need to be aware of your thoughts. Catharsis is a luxury in today’s world. When I was with Swagata and then ghosted her, after that my whole world changed, and here I was writing poetry for her like I do for my women, but well being with her took me a step closer to enlightenment. Castles in the air and such things.

Now let’s explore this topic in detail, was it because of her? Evidences suggest that it actually was, first, the sickness of Chacha, me feeling fear, feeling gaslighted by Ranga, seeing his names on billboards and such things. I feel it was more of mixed bag and torture porn but well there has to be a triggering factor.

The second reason might be vetting. Probably people were being vetted on the network and I did not fit the bill. Explains the cognitus interruptus.

The third reason might be offensive/political comments. Explains the cognitus interruptus too.

The fourth reason might just be torture porn in wake of “The Most Dangerous Game”.

I wasn’t aware of the system because I did not need to be. I suppose the above triggers made the establishment get involved (that is if it wasn’t already involved, which I highly doubt) and I was fucked from the metros as well as locally. Gives you an idea of the reach of the network. I was unaware of the internal sabotage which is a local thing I suppose, but on the cyber front I could see the effects. After Swagata I feel insecure on the cyber front and rightly so. If Google changes to Bangla, you got to get worried, and then there was Bollywood, so much for minding one’s own business. I was saving my chats with Swagata so that I could write a romantic story, and it was a short lived romance, but then power dynamics can be changed with help of connection and resources. I have no doubts that I should have stayed on Tumblr but that’s fine, what’s happened had happened. It gave me a whole new perspective about things, the efforts were on whole new level on my wedding day, all this for talking on phone and chats for one or two months. It was beautiful. I have just one question though, did the deep state get involve because of Swagata or my posts and comments? Aaditee, even if she is involved, I have no hard feelings about her because I was made to doubt her all through 2013 to 2015, until I decided to trust her, oh how much I care for that girl, she is just too worldly for me, we would have lived as best friends had I married her, but then I had my limitations which first turned into a curse and then a boon. I have no hopes from Purvanchal deep state but I assure you that I will personally destroy each and everyone who was involved in Purvanchal, they were my own. I better not survive this because if I do. You won’t.

Major

 Dec 29, 2021

When you go into depth, you see stuff. You see hidden designs. The loss is not so much of a problem than the feeling of loss and of it being irreparable. It’s just strange how people think. My fear was continuous and I spent that time utilising it for the good. I watched cartoons, listened to good music, and tried to DJ. Me wanting to be a DJ was not due to the desire of making people dance but just the appreciation for good music and wanting to create good music. It’s just so good when establishment is after you. For what it is not known, but then you expect that there is a system in place and everyone does their job diligently, which is not really true in case of India. With time you understand the system, but time can’t go back and you can’t get what’s lost. Only way is way forward. You gave yourself an impossible target and good thing about impossible targets is that you achieve the best you can do. In the meantime you got to see how low can the establishment stoop, and I must tell you that there is no limit to it. The establishment can stoop below the abyss and continue going down, there is no actual limit. You have been to the abyss. You are familiar with it. You know its nook and corners. When you visited the mental hospital for academic purposes you saw people talking to the American president and filmstars. Normal helpless people, common people. You saw a lawyer losing it, muttering the beliefs about castes he had, or maybe those were not even his beliefs. You see the system, the local system and how it is controlled. It’s all so boring, and things are kept boring. There is a structure to that system. A set of beliefs that drive that system and that system can be called as cruel. The beliefs are simple, you got to tie yourself to the study table and qualify a government exam and then you are considered to be successful, people other than that are expected to do business (not respectable), become criminals or join politics (to later control the government officials). I have no regrets for not walking on the beaten path, one, because I just couldn’t do it because of my disability and handicaps and two because later in life I realised that it was really a waste of time.

What do you get when you try to force someone’s twitter persona on his personality? You get an ass fucking that you will remember whole of your life. It was fun while it lasted. It’s actually strange how people not only think the people from underdeveloped areas are beneath them (that may be wrong but actually people can’t be blamed because of their conditioning) but do concerted efforts to sabotage them, I mean if you really considered them beneath you why make so much effort unless it is sadism or naked show of power ofcourse. The establishment here is busy stealing my mental designs and mocking me for it, I find it hilarious, I am an artist I can create more, I have no issues with it, even though it’s petty thievery. But doesn’t capitalism also mean paying people for their ideas? I am not against capitalism but consider me against it if it is petty thievery. What if the government is stealing my mental designs, well, then I will just consider it a tax and service to my nation, I am a patriot you see.

Science Fiction

Dec 28, 2021

There is a model. People communicating without words. There is a design to how all of it works and then there are people who make others crazy. Ingredients required, emotions, what emotions are caused due to specific circumstances, memories, thoughts that cause anxiety, what kind of anxiety that’s a whole different matter, and it all happens in Purvanchal, in India. People with power make others crazy, kill them from inside or employ psychic torture. The design must be like this, the people who know thought communication communicate with each others via thoughts, and then there must be the ones who read thoughts and steal memories. What do you need, cultural awareness, knowledge for reference, technology or ability, resources. The people employed to torture identify the feelings, and that makes them not better than the one who is being tortured. The whole game is of power dynamic. The awareness of how the one being tortured feels fear, shame, anger, lust and other emotions are of utmost importance. Whether machines can identify these feelings yet is not known to me, but then feelings are entities. What is curious to me is other brains or machine whatever it is translating the words exactly from the thought form. This hints as thoughts of people being similar and that thought insertion is possible.

It’s really interesting that thoughts are not encrypted and any machine or probably other brain can read those thoughts. Thoughts need references to be decoded exactly, the contexts must be known, how does that happen, when it’s a human brain it happens by watching thoughts and how they are formed. The relations between the thoughts and their source. The anxiety colours your thought and you want to become invisible, or do you. Something in you wants to become invisible for sure, just not you. It’s a series of unfortunate events and you think your life is over. Little things matter so much, you know. Sometimes they mean the world. Life could have been different you don’t regret it. The best thing you did was not wasting any time. You did not waste any time and you did your best. You fought the world for what is truly yours. In the midst of sabotage you had fun. It was the most fun you ever had. You realised how dirty the world can be. How evil human beings can be. They play around with your thoughts because they know your beliefs, beliefs except the really important ones should be variable, that is the best defence against sabotage, they just shouldn’t cross the line to become hypocrisy, fight well, fight right and fight fierce.

 

Tibetan Time Trap

 Dec 27,2021

Truth has a meaning. Sometimes we run away from something and it may be anything. Awareness is a thing. There is a variability about the world. Everything keeps changing. Culture is an important thing. It shapes us. I don’t think much about somethings and I block some things. It’s so funny that my life is even more interesting than the stories I write but I wonder which voice should I use to write that story. It’s all a game of ideas. Everything is ideas. When I was talking to Swagata in 2013, I had fallen in love, I had pumped up my ego because I had expected that I would get out of the shit I am. This was an example of extreme optimism. The world is layered, excluding our own mental spaces, there are relationships that we share with others and then there are other designs. There have been blocks setup, and methods of sabotage in this world which can be applied physically, financially, via cyber and if all that doesn’t work directly in the mind via thought manipulation. With Swagata it was beautiful while it lasted. I scolded her, not a fond memory and I felt hurt myself about it probably but lies make you do it, well, it was not exactly a lie, but then I am a layered person. World totally changes when you block yourself. During twitter phase when it first started it was about class. You see elite models wearing Levi’s jeans and you see someone’s opinion about yourself. You had forgotten how the world works. You had thought you can climb up and make up for the missed chances by climbing up a rope. You had thought others will also be compartmentalized just to fulfill your emotional needs. Some Bollywood journalist will provide you with emotional needs by becoming platonic just because you have that thought in your mind, but that didn’t happen and the whole media machinery including online media started acting to make you mad, and that thing was just recreation for you. Nine years for wanting recreation what a waste of time. I love it that I am grounded. I don’t fear death but I have a residual fear remaining in me. Giving fancy words to the culture shock that I experienced would be funny. Sometimes there are some ugly things about you, but that ugliness also depends on comparison with world and large and your image of what you consider as ugly. When I was blocked I had no other options. Actually I had, if I see it now but at that time I had no options. I was alone and afraid in the whole wide world and I was angry, very angry. It is a very human trait to be angry with the ones you love. It is a very human trait and totally not an animal trait. Sometimes you assume the world to he right and yourself to be wrong. Memory is a strange thing, it takes colour of your thoughts. What does a young boy want, and how does his thoughts take colour of his reality. You take the trauma as it comes you lose a world. You lose a whole world just because you did not like something in you, and because you imagined yourself as something else. A shapeshifter, a player of roles thinks like this. The trauma is too much. Why you don’t know. Was the technology involved at that time too? Who knows. You lost a lot of life, but you gained a lot of life too. But you focused on the lost life and alos the fear of the ruin of future because you thought you couldn’t be able to handle that, because of course the image in the mind and awareness of the class. It was like a personal mission, and it had to be graceful because you like grace.

Ideas and beliefs are important. Fear of an idea is a potent thing and it forms further beliefs. Some ideas get buried in the graveyard of memory. The psychic imbalance, the residue of fear. You want to find the flow to talk all about it but it is hidden in the vaults of subconscious. There is a visible world and then there are metaphysical designs. There is culture and when culture interact with each other there emerge new things. Being in a psychic torture chamber has its own charm. You didn’t think your culture is capable of anything but yet examination of ideas happen. You took the word freedom for granted, you took it on face value thinking everyone gets freedom. But in the psychic torture chamber there are examination of ideas from different perspectives. Mainly from the present sorry state of culture that we are in. People see big dreams, but Indian culture has been made to evolve in a way that is unique. Metaphysical designs are everywhere, from down to up. There are ideas and then beliefs. Ideas mother other ideas and beliefs. The psychic torture chamber focuses on ideas and their and the way they look in cultural perspective. My psychic torture chamber is North Indian and belongs to either Eastern Uttar Pradesh or Bihar. They failed to make me commit any crime so they decided to torture me with my each thought. Coloured in perspectives, north Indian perspectives, philosophical perspectives. There are layers in the North Indian culture, the way families are manipulated and controlled. The way people’s emotions and thoughts are manipulated and controlled, one wouldn’t have expected this in a democracy but it is how it is. It’s like a dimensional chess thing, but if the person remains conscious, the final choice remains in his hands. Culture is variable, it may take an ugly form or it may take a good form, it all depends actually. The design is such, the responsibility of what happens lies in the hands of the person but he can be manipulated to the full extent. Academic psychology doesn’t take into accounts different cultures. The employment of culture in the torture method has some parameters, and the people who do the torture must not only be aware of the culture but also have their initial conditioning according to it or otherwise must be really good at it. In my case it is East UP. Things are going to go batshit here when I say the whole conversation is via thoughts. So either human beings have this unawakened or latent power or it’s technology.

Batshit Sci-fi

Dec 14, 2021

It's all so difficult, isn't it. The daily neurological torture. Strange dreams. One would like to wonder how does it happen? Does it happen by satellites? Are direct energy weapons real? People speaking in your head is sure shot sign of schizophrenia, or is it? What if it is a hive mind. Designed specifically to torture you, because you once scolded a girl supposedly of class higher than you, or may be you wrote some extra saucy or extar political stuff on social media. The question is how does it happen? Is it like mobile phone, wherever you go network follows? How do they speak in your head? Is it nanotechnology? Is it occult? How do they have access to your memories? You know the modus operandi, you just don't understand the technology, modus operandi is placing you in scenarios where you are forced to remember something from your past, or may be just laying low while you are swimming in the past, something that a lot of losers do. 

Did they really plant a chip in your brain, that directly sends data to the satellite? I mean in the train even mobile doesn't get network bars but the technology of hive mind and neurological control works perfectly fine. What's the secret? Your best guess would be what you have already guessed. Some sort of nanotechnology and a direct connection with a satellite. But you will be really shocked if it is occult, but people speaking in your head don't seem spirtually mature enough to be occultists. They are petty criminals at best, though some of them look criminally insane but their awareness puts them back into the petty criminal category. 

Now can they really shoot lasers through a concrete roof to your crotch? Can they really teleport you? Can they really teleport you to a totally different timeline? A timeline where you are having a worse life than a previous timeline? Can they make you shoot energy orbs from your orbs which can travel to Mumbai ( which is in future) and come back to the place where you are (that is in the past) please see the past and future here as timezones. You wonder since how many years this technology has existed. And then you remember the movie A Beautiful Mind, then you remember George Orwell and then your remember Aldous Huxley's A Brave New World. It all starts to make a little sense to you. Either they were geniuses which of course they were or they were geniuses and had derived their experiences or inspirations from somewhere. 

MK Ulta

Dec 10, 2021

I have to make a habit of thinking everything through the lens of mind control. I don't talk about it for the fear of looking like a conspiracy theorist but then what is real is real. There is no real freedom and I realised this fact when I was being sabotaged. What did I really want, do my job, and have a few friends to talk about pop culture, and yes watch occasional porn. It doesn't take an intelligent person long to realise that they are living in George Orwell's 1984, and it curious to see how this technology of mind control and sabotage reacts with different cultures. In India it's not looking good, the reason being sheer incompetence. If you are practicing mass-surveillance and mind control as a state, the least you can do is let people fuck around (with their own volition ofcourse), these are just the basics of administration, if Chanakya would have been alive he would've known that. But the problem is India is a deeply sexually repressed country and a very horny one too. The people who control the mind control apparatus are morally corrupt voyeurs who don't practice what they preach. I personally have no interest in sex except for the occasional porn I watch and few deeply satisfying encounters I have had, also because I have women in my life both in physical and platonic capacity. What a fool Edward Snowden made of himself worldwide, but I consider him a martyr, because if he had not sacrificed himself it would have difficult for fools like me to guess about the apparatus while they were being sabotaged but then it's all bigger than just internet surveillance. It's biotechnology. Good that I was a fan of cyberpunk literature, and Hollywood movies are right when they show family is bigger than the whole world. That's the only reason a self-destructive person like me is still surviving. In short, all I want to say that pat attention to the thought bubbles in your head, they can be state or corporate sponsored. I have tricks for both scenarios, if you suspect it's the state, try giving a head to your head of state in your head (see I did it!), and if you suspect it's corporate keep playing random advertisements in your head in your free time. Not sure it will help but I think it's your best bet when you are being sabotaged.