Life Forty-seven

I love literature and I love writing. I first started writing in the late 2000s and that time was different. People used to have personal blogs back then where they used to express themselves or document their lives. Just recently I saw people doing that again on my Wordpress feed and on Substack. I look back at my late 2000s and early 2010s blog with me expressing my will to help people with my knowledge of medicine and writing slice-of-life, travelogues and poems and short stories. Back then I did not know that this country is run by a criminal syndicate projecting itself as providence and my supposed home region of Purvanchal is run by protection racket. Back then I took life as it came and while I still do that I also tend to anticipate things. I have lived an extremely tough life but I have thoroughly enjoyed it because I know that if my life was not tough I would have made it tough by choosing an interest like mountaineering. In late 2000s I recorded my life and thoughts on a blog and now in late 2020s I still to the same however redundant it might have become. I have made and discarded numerous blogs along the way because I wanted to have the vibe just right and now I think it is in case of my blogs. I proofread my formal blogs such as my Substack and Medium with AI because I do not get time to correct grammar and other mistakes, the main goal however is conveying the idea. This particular blog is for intimate writing but it ended up becoming political as I ended up realising personal is in fact political and if one is not privileged all art ends up becoming political. I write about my interests such as book, comic books and pop culture on my Wordpress blog and I also maintain a lifestyle blog. I think I have written enough for the diagnosis of human condition in present times and for awareness and now I must focus on my interests, which is writing fiction. I think my writing would pass the test of writing but I also believe that one shouldn't hesitate in writing just because they are afraid their writing wouldn't pass the test of time because writings are evidence of the times people have lived in and it doesn't matter whether they pass the test of the time. Long form writing is mostly extinct in this country except the recent small peak that I saw on Substack and Wordpress feeds and some longform writing in Hindi that is present on Facebook. I however continue to write and hope to write some fiction that satisfies and entertains me above all. When one can't find the fiction that entertains them they must create it and it is especially true in today's times, the era of shortform videos. The issue with fiction I face is negotiating it with the reality I have faced in my life that is stranger than fiction and it is the reason for the inertia in my fiction writing though I hope that it would get resolved. Writing is a hobby, an interest and a vocation, and for me it is mostly a hobby and a vocation and I practice it as an art and for bringing awareness to those who read me. I had given up the thought of having writing as my vocation when I realised becoming a published author is not an organic thing based on talent but a game of contacts in this country though I might end up self-publishing some of my work later in life.